Boners

Boner Fight for January 6th, 2020

Boner Candidate #1: LOUIS, YOU ARE SUCH A GOHMERT.

East Texas congressman Louie Gohmert suggested that “violence in the streets” may be the only remaining option to block Joe Biden from becoming president, after a federal judge rejected his lawsuit aiming to force Vice President Mike Pence to overturn the election. U.S. District Judge Jeremy Kernodle, an appointee of President Donald Trump from Gohmert’s hometown of Tyler, threw out the lawsuit late Friday, ruling that he and other plaintiffs — including the GOP chairwoman in Arizona and that state’s defeated slate of Republican electors — lack standing. Late Saturday, a federal appeals court upheld the ruling. Late Friday on Newsmax, Gohmert said he had sought redress in court “so that you didn’t have to have riots and violence in the street.” “Bottom line is, the court is saying, ‘We’re not going to touch this, you have no remedy,’” Gohmert said. “Basically, in effect, the ruling would be that you’ve got to go to the streets and be as violent as antifa and BLM.” It’s not the first time Gohmert — a former state trial court judge who just won his ninth term in Congress — has expressed admiration for the use of violence to overturn an election.

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Boner Candidate #2: MILEY, YOU SHOULD RESIST THE URGE TO SHARE THINGS ABOUT YOUR LIFE.

Miley Cyrus likes to put her sex toys out on display. In a recent interview with Sirius XM radio’s Barstool Sports show, the Plastic Hearts singer revealed that her home is decorated with various sex toys as sculptures. “I like sex toys,” she declared. “I buy them for myself, but I end up using them for interior design. Sex and interior design go actually hand-in-hand.” Back in August, she explained on the Call Her Daddy podcast that she likes the way her plethora of vibrators look as home decor. “Most of my sex toys I use as interior design — I do like sex toys as interior design. I’ll buy a dildo, and [for] more than … its operation — I don’t really wanna get in there with it because I love the way it looks on my table,” she explained. “I’m really into dildos for interior design. I buy them for myself, but I end up using them for interior design. I like vibrators, but I mostly like aesthetic.” “I like d–ks as an aesthetic. Girls are way hotter. We know this. Everyone I think can agree that d–ks make wonderful sculptures. But more than that, I am not as interested. I like d–ks as art pieces. I love the shape,” she added.

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