Boner of the Day

Boner Fight for March 25th, 2020

Boner Candidate #1: TERRORIST LICKING

A Warrenton man was charged with making a terrorist threat after he filmed himself licking bunch of items at Walmart. “Who’s afraid of the coronavirus?” Cody Pfister, 26, taunts in a video he later posted to social media. The video spread around the world, and Warrenton police said in a statement the department had been contacted by people in the Netherlands, Ireland and the United Kingdom. “We take these complaints very seriously and would like to thank all of those who reported the video so the issue could be addressed,” police said in the statement. The video appears to have been filmed on March 11 at the Warrenton store, according to court records. Pfister was taken into custody this week, and Warren County prosecutors charged him today. The charge is a low-level felony. Bizarrely, he’s not the first person to get in trouble with police for licking surfaces as public health officials beg people to wash their hands, keep at least six feet apart and avoid touching their faces in hopes of slowing the spread of COVID-19. The manager of a grocery store in Wisconsin called police after a woman licked the door handle to a freezer, reportedly to protest the virus, while a manager was disinfecting the store, Newsweek reported.     Read More

Boner Candidate #2: CORONAVIRUS PARTY, WHA HOO!!

Kentucky Gov. Andy Beshear announced Tuesday 39 new coronavirus cases in the state, including one young adult who attended a “coronavirus party,” apparently held to flaunt social distancing guidelines. “This is one that makes me mad, and it should make you mad,” Beshear said of the case that occurred after the person attended a party of people in their 20s, who health officials say are as a group less vulnerable to the COVID-19 disease caused by the novel coronavirus. “Anyone who goes to something like this may think they’re indestructible, but it’s someone else’s loved one that they are going to hurt,” he said at a news conference in the capital, Frankfort. “We are battling for the health and the lives of our parents and our grandparents,” he said. “Don’t be callous as to intentionally go to something and expose yourself to something that will hurt other people. We ought to be much better than that.” Beshear, a first-term Democrat, also announced that he would issue an order on Wednesday requiring all businesses not considered “life-sustaining” to close as part of the effort to contain the spread of the virus. He said grocery stores, pharmacies, filling stations and banks would be among those exempted from the order. Read More


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