Boner of the Day

Boner Fight for September 10th, 2019

Boner Candidate #1: OH ELMO NO

NEW YORK — One of the costumed characters in New York City’s Times Square faces multiple charges after being accused of touching a teenage girl inappropriately, police said. According to authorities, the 14-year-old girl had just snapped a photo with the man dressed as Elmo from “Sesame Street” when he allegedly grabbed her buttocks. The incident happened around 6:30 p.m. on Saturday, police said. Inocente Andrade-Pacheco, of Passaic, New Jersey, was arrested and is now facing charges including forcible touching and acting in a manner injurious to a child, according to authorities. The incident is the latest in a long history of the costumed performers harassing and even fighting tourists, often stemming from arguments over tips. There were several notable violent incidents in 2014, including Spider-Man punching a police officer in the face. The same year, Woody from Toy Story was nabbed for reportedly groping several young girls, and Cookie Monster was cuffed for allegedly attacking a toddler. In response to the violence, the city created “designated activity zones” in Times Square to section-off where characters can be and minimize peddling. “What happened yesterday is an example of certain characters feel like they can get away with just about anything,” said Tim Tompkins, President of the Times Square Alliance.

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Boner Candidate #2: WE CAN SAVE AMERICA IF WE GET RID OF COLLEGE

A Republican Tennessee lawmaker says he supports getting rid of higher education because he argues it would cut off the “liberal breeding ground.” Sen. Kerry Roberts of Springfield called for eliminating higher education while speaking about attending a recent abortion legislative hearing on his conservative radio talk show on Sept. 2. Roberts specifically called out one activist who testified in favor of protecting abortion rights. He asserted, without evidence, that the woman’s beliefs were a “product of higher education” and claimed that getting rid of higher education would “save America.” The senator did not immediately respond to a request for further elaboration. Roberts also questioned funding higher education with tax dollars. He voted in favor of the state’s $38.5 billion budget earlier this year, which included money for colleges and universities. Read More


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