Boners

Boner of the Day for February 16th, 2021

Round One

Boner Candidate #1: WE TOOK THE ‘HUNTING’ OUT OF HUNTING

While frowned upon in many states, the use of bait and trail cameras has become increasingly common for big game hunting in Utah. Some hunters are known to pile apples in the woods weeks before deer season and rig motion-activated cameras on trees. When a deer comes into view for a tasty sugar fix, the trail cameras snap a photo and moments later the image appears in the hunter’s text-message feed. The practice all but guarantees a successful hunt and Rep. Casey Snider wants to put an end to it. “One of the things that’s always been important to me, and it’s why I enjoy hunting, is there’s always been this notion of a hunting ethic and fair chase,” said Snider, a Republican from Paradise in Cache County. “If it was just about killing, we could probably all just go to the grocery store, but it’s about something more than that.” Snider is a committed hunter who ran legislation last year to enshrine the right to hunt and fish in the Utah Constitution — voters approved that addition — but he fears baiting and cameras degrade big game hunting.

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Boner Candidate #2: I JUST CAN’T HELP MYSELF

Spokane, WA — Police in the Washington city say a man committed a felony 20 minutes after his release from jail, reports the Spokesman-Review. At 10:08pm Saturday, 31-year-old Marcus Goodman was released from the Spokane County Jail after being arrested on an unspecified felony charge. At 10:28pm, police say Goodman carjacked a 16-year-old girl about a mile and half from the jail, per KXLY. An officer spotted the car on the road about 1am, and Goodman was soon back in custody—and back in the same jail—on a charge of second-degree robbery. The young victim identified Goodman as a her assailant. She said her carjacker told her he had a gun before taking her car, though no weapon was actually displayed.

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Boner Candidate #3: YOU JOINED SATAN’S ARMY

Illinois Republican Rep. Adam Kinzinger has released a scathing handwritten letter he received from a number of his relatives, calling him a ‘disappointment to God’ and a stain on their family’s name for backing the impeachment of Donald Trump. Kinzinger told the New York Times he received the disparaging note just two days after he called for Trump to be removed from office following the Capitol riots on January 6. Penned by 11 members of his extended family, Kinzinger was accused in the letter of being in cahoots with ‘the devils army (Democrats and the fake news media)’ for publicly opposing the then-president, and requesting the 25th Amendment be invoked against him. ‘Oh my, what a disappointment you are to me and to God!’ the letter, dated January 8, begins. ‘We were once so proud of your accomplishments! Instead, you go against your Christian principals and join the “devil’s army”.’ ‘How do you call yourself a Christian when you join the “devil’s army” believing in abortion!’ the note continues. ‘We thought you were “smart” enough to see how the left is brainwashing so many.’

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Round Two

Boner Candidate #1: “THIS DIDN’T SEEM LIKE AN ARMED INSURRECTION TO ME,”

MADISON, Wis. – Two days after members of the U.S. Senate acquitted former President Donald Trump on a charge of inciting the deadly Jan. 6 attack on the U.S. Capitol, Wisconsin’s senior senator questioned whether an armed insurrection even occurred. U.S. Sen. Ron Johnson toured the state’s airwaves on Monday making the claim, despite video footage and photos of the attack showing participants erecting gallows on the Capitol grounds, deploying pepper spray strong enough to injure bears, carrying zip ties, hurling a fire extinguisher, using baseball bats to smash windows, and throwing flags like spears at police officers. “This didn’t seem like an armed insurrection to me,” the Republican said in an interview on WISN-AM with conservative talk radio show host Jay Weber after condemning the events at the U.S. Capitol that day. “I mean ‘armed,’ when you hear ‘armed,’ don’t you think of firearms? Here’s the questions I would have liked to ask. How many firearms were confiscated? How many shots were fired? I’m only aware of one, and I’ll defend that law enforcement officer for taking that shot. It was a tragedy, OK? But I think there was only one.”

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Boner Candidate #2: WE ARE AN ENGLISH ONLY STATE

A few months ago housing advocates, professors and attorneys came together as a working group formed by the Utah courts to brainstorm ways to halt, or at least curb, evictions. One idea that emerged was to translate certain key pieces of eviction law information into Spanish, Vietnamese and Arabic to help communities of color hit hard by evictions, with advocates offering to pay for certified translations. One of the landlord attorneys bounced the idea off Paul Smith, head of The Utah Apartment Association. He was not receptive. “We are an English only state,” Smith wrote in an email obtained by The Utah Investigative Journalism Project. “It’s hard enough to interpret meaning in one language, let alone additional languages that wouldn’t be binding in the courts.” In another section of the email the attorney asked Smith what he thought about research presented to the working group from the Utah Commission on Criminal and Juvenile Justice that showed evictions had a disproportionate impact on minority and low-income households.

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Boner Candidate #3: THIS IS SPIRITUAL WARFARE

Vaccines usually have a true virus dead or alive plus toxins. You take a little of to have knowledge of and make the vaccine work. The Covid Vaccines takes a genetic code recombinant (computer generated) that tricks the body to make a protein and produce parts of the virus code so the body can see it and fight it. It is experimental. Should take 10 years to do it right. Moderna never had made a vaccine for humans. You are a research subject. You hear it will be safe and effective and it is not known to be actually true. A synthetic code is injected not from nature into the body. The body will destroy it. Nano Technology particles or Hydrogel envelops the synthetic code to protect it from disintegration. It has many uses. It also is used as a bio sensor. Tiny computer bits gather all your info and transmit it wirelessly. Look up Profuse & Darpa (already using this). Signals can be sent out. It is called Artificial Intelligence or Transhumanism. This could be the end of human 1.0 to a new species. This use of technology can exterminate us as humans. Supreme Court Justice said Company that owns the Technology can patent and own us (part robot). They are using modified messenger RNA. They say don’t worry it may only be temporary. We don’t know that.

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