Boners

Boner of the Day for February 8, 2021

ROUND ONE

Boner Candidate #1: 911? I NEED HELP WITH MY I.D.

After her fake ID was seized at a bar, an 18-year-old Oklahoman called police for help in getting the illegal item returned, according to cops who instead arrested her. Investigators say that Blakelee Sands sought admittance Tuesday evening to a bar in Edmond, a city outside Oklahoma City. But she was turned away by a bouncer who confiscated her phony Texas ID, which carried the name “McKamie Queen.” When her demands for the ID’s return were rejected by bar personnel, Sands (seen at right) made the mistake of dialing police.

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Boner Candidate #2: I’D LIKE MY CHILD TO OPT OUT OF THAT BLACK STUFF

A Utah charter school said it is no longer allowing parents to opt students out of its Black History Month curriculum after drawing backlash for initially giving families the option to do so. Maria Montessori Academy Director Micah Hirokawa said in a statement shared with The Hill that all school families are now participating in the curriculum and that going forward it would not allow parents to opt out of the lesson plans. “Celebrating Black History Month is part of our tradition,” Hirokawa said in the statement, which was also posted in the “Utah Montessorians” Facebook group.

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Boner Candidate #3: NOT FUNNY

A Super Bowl ad from Cure Auto Insurance, which played right before halftime Sunday night, is drawing criticism for belittling the seriousness of workplace harassment. The ad takes place within an office where a lady is seated behind a desk – with two employees – one female and one male.

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ROUND TWO

Boner Candidate #1: HEY JUDGE; HEY YOUR HONOR…HOW YOU DOING?

Broward County, FL — At least they can’t charge him with stealing her heart — because that didn’t work. An accused burglar tried to virtually flirt with a Florida judge while she heard his case Thursday in Broward County, a hilarious moment captured by the court’s live video stream. Judge Tabitha Blackmon, joined by a prosecutor and a defense attorney, called the defendant’s case and watched as he stepped into the camera.

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Boner Candidate #2: WANT TO GO RINO HUNTING?

The conservative blog RedState has retracted a blog post announcing a new contest that encouraged readers to go “RINO hunting,” and report back to their comment section. The original article published Saturday morning called on RedState readers to help the publication gather “targets” for a new weekly competition which was billed by the outlet as a peculiar form of “organizing.” A photo of Rep. Liz Cheney (R-WY), who drew the ire of supporters of former President Donald Trump when she voted in favor of impeachment, was featured at the top of the article.

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Boner Candidate #3: I JUST FOLLOWED THE MAP APP

Sierra Nevada, CA — Harland Earls was driving through California’s Sierra Nevada, on his way to a birthday party in Truckee last month, when his GPS suggested he turn up ahead for a shorter route. So he left Highway 49 for Henness Pass Road—which does, in hindsight, sound ominous during a snowstorm. He soon became stuck in the snow. Henness Pass Road isn’t plowed; it’s only open during the summer, WDJT reports. “The GPS doesn’t know if there’s six feet of snow on a road or if the road is clear and passable,” Sierra County Sheriff Mike Fisher said.

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