ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: COME ON; THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME. THEY ALL HAVE THE SAME LAST NAME.
West Valley’s own Vanguard Academy was discovered to have questionable ties to the polygamous Kingston group which also goes by the name ‘the Order.’
Boner Candidate #2: I WAS ONLY GOING A HUNDRED.
A driver in Florida told police that ‘he was only going 100 mph’ when in reality, he was speeding at 130 mph.
Boner Candidate #3: BETTER LATE THAN NEVER.
After more then 200 failed attempts, a bill labelling lynching as a federal crime has finally been passed.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: YOU REALLY NEED TO CHECK THE SPELLING ON THESE THINGS.
A woman on TikTok tried to have her father’s name tattooed on herself as a tribute to him. His name was tattooed on as “Jhon” instead of “John.”
Boner Candidate #2: THE COPS ARE ALWAYS AFTER ME LUCKY CHARMS.
A shipment of cereal was found to be marijuana being smuggled to the UK.
Boner Candidate #3: SQUATTERS!!!
A woman who bought a home in Florida discovered that it was already occupied by squatters who faked their housing contract.
