Boners

Boner Preview Candidates for March 09 2016

Boner Preview Candidate #1: THE DEATH OF A SWAN

A swan in Macedonia is the latest animal victim of human beings driven to idiotic extremes by the desire for a good selfie.

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Boner Preview Candidate #I HAVE TO FINISH SOMETHING BEFORE I PULL OVER

A motorist who knew he was headed for jail decided he had some unfinished business to complete before pulling over for a traffic stop on Sunday in Macomb County, police said.

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Boner Preview Candidate #3: YOU MAY NOT MAKE IT TO THE HOSPITAL ALIVE

Police say a city woman bought a large kitchen knife, stabbed her husband with it when he came home from work, and then stabbed him again as she drove him to the hospital Friday afternoon.

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Boner Preview Candidate #4: NONE OF THIS IS IN ANY WAY APPROPRIATE

Pennsylvania State Police say a woman cyberbullied her son’s ex-girlfriend by posting online a nude picture the girl sent to him when she was just 12.

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Boner Preview Candidate #5: WE’RE SORRY BUT DUCKWORTH DOESN’T TAKE ANY STEPS TO HELP VETS.

A GOP effort to jab Rep. Tammy Duckworth (D-Ill.), who is currently running for Senate, backfired spectacularly on Tuesday when the National Republican Senatorial Committee sent out a tweet accusing the combat veteran and double amputee of “not standing up for our veterans.”

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Boner Preview Candidatee #6: TREE? TREE YOU SAY? OH, THE TREE.

The Roselle police report may not have captured all the color of the incident. It did, however, get to the heart of it.

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