Life

10 of the Best NEW Songs and The Women of Instagram They Remind Me Of

It’s Summertime and you supposedly have free time…

With free time comes great responsibility, so I am using a bit of my free time to present a list of my favorite songs along with some pictures of women* who seem to spend a lot of time on Instagram…probably for no other reason than to make this list. Plus, it makes for some decent click-bait.

* I don’t know any of these women personally. I am literally projecting and inventing backstories and personality traits for the purpose of this blog. It’s an exercise in presumption on my part. I realize these women would never really give me the time of day. I also realize it’s a superficial pursuit I am embarking on and probably sexist on a few levels. Maybe Gina can write a simliar article from a woman’s point of view and balance it out or something.

1. Hot Hot Heat “Kid Who Stays in the Picture”

Sadly, the new Hot Hot Heat album will be the last Hot Hot Heat album. The Sideshow Bob-hairstyled, Steve Bays and company have decided to call it quits with one last album out Friday, June, 24th. The title track from the album is much more laid back than songs like “Bandages” and “Island of the Honest Man” and more akin to “Middle of Nowhere”, which should have been a huge hit, but the world isn’t fair and Hot Hot Heat never did manage to break through.

Reminds me of…Camilla Storchi

Camilla seems like a woman who doesn’t take life too seriously but has a lot of pictures of her during sunsets in tropical places. A metaphor for the first single off Hot Hot Heat’s last album. The sun’s about to set, we’re sad the day is over, but we’re still smiling in the beautiful place. Camilla seems to be like your cute friend that happens to be a girl and there’s always been a hint of sexual undertones in the relationship.

✨✨✨Find your therapy✨✨✨ #dowhatmakesyouhappy #happyalohafriday wearing @morayswimwear

A photo posted by Camila Storchi (@camilastorchi) on

2. Bishop Briggs “Wild Horses”

I am overly in love with this song and there for Bishop Briggs. Formerly known as simple Bishop, she changed her moniker to Bishop Briggs to pay homage to her hometown of Bishopbriggs, Scotland. Talk about dedication to one’s hometown. Her real name is Sarah Grace McLaughlin, quite pretty in and of itself, says I. The xylophone is quite an underused instrument and I’m glad to see someone figured out what to do with it. Honestly, I can hear a remix of this with Ghostface Killah laying down some verse over the bridge. This is just a great summer track. You can party to it, make love to it, do the dishes to it, clean the pool to it…

Reminds me of…Irina Shayk

Irina has a certain edge to her that reminds me of “Wild Horses.” There seems to be no taming her and she’s most graceful when left to run free. #ammirite?

3. The Faint “Young & Realistic”

Dance indie. Possibly the best genre or random happening dance parties. The Faint are at the top of this game. “Young & Realistic” certainly has an 80’s feel to it, but not dated. Certainly, a solid way to set off a summer party to be played at large decibels.

Reminds me of…Alysha Nett

Alysha basically looks how I think this song sounds: dangerous and fun. By day she drives a Porche 918 Spyder at high speeds and night she fights crime with a code of no ethics. You’re scared of her, but truly want to go along for the ride. Much like feeling you’ll have your bros catch you binge-watching “Orange is the New Black.” It’s not as bad as them catching you watching “Girls”, but could leave a mark on your psychologically.

4. The Avalanches “Frankie Sinatra”

This song is roughly 13-years in the making and I agree, it isn’t what I expected at all, which was to be expected. Sure it sounds a bit like a cross between Asher Roth and Gorillaz, but at least it’s interesting. It certainly has grown on me.

Reminds me of…Alyssa Julya

Alyssa seems hip, but quirky – a bit nostalgic, but fresh. These are the contradictions that make life interesting, much like the song above. 

5. Black Pistol Fire “Bad Blood”

A Canadian blues-rock band inspired by The White Stripes and The Black Keys. Do we really need another one of these kinds of bands? Well, if it’s good of course we do, and Black Pistol Fire is pretty damn solid. Good music for when you are standing over a BBQ or spending long streches in the shade of a long, hot day.

Reminds me of…Sara Mills

Whhhhaat! Look at those eyes. Look at those tats. How can so much badass be wrapped up in so much alluring? “I know you know she said, “don’t let me see you coming ’round my way.” Look again at those eyes and repeat those lyrics from “Bad Blood.” You’ll understand what I’m getting at.

6. Two Door Cinema Club “Are We Ready? (Wreck)”

I love Two Door Cinema Club. There’s just a cool vibe all over this band. Great return and solid form, true to their sound with a good drive and great song for your workout playlist.

Reminds me of…Lindsey Kevitch

A little bit hipster, but doesn’t have to sell it  because it all works. Good with coffee, beer or a Diet Coke. Real all around beauty and cool like the first 3 seasons of “Californication.” I doubt Lindsey or Two Door Cinema Club will ever just the shark or take on a bad collaboration with Rza.

Runnin thru the 6 @meganeclaire

A photo posted by èl | rae (@lindseykevitch) on

6. Sleigh Bells “Rule Number One” (Wreck)”

“Pop Rocks and Coke make your head explode!” Yes! A little less distortion, not much, just a little, but this new track from Sleigh Bells is bad ass and relentless. Melodic? Hell no, but that’s not why you listen to this band.

Reminds me of…Sahara Ray

One time, or so I’ve heard, Sahara burnt her toast. Do you know what she did next? She not only ate that shit, but she made more toast and burnt it on purpose and at that charred bread too. You can just tell she cooler than you. You won’t understand why? Same with Sleigh Bells. They’re just cool and you can’t have them. So, so sassy…

???????????????? @ratandboa

A photo posted by Sahara Ray (@sahara_ray) on

7. Pop Etc. “What Am I Becoming”

A song about the effect of the unknown wrapped in some poppy rock music that’s pretty gosh darn catchy. Just a great song you won’t easily tire of.

Reminds me of…Hope Isabel Howard

So this one might be a bit literal, but at number 7 I am running out of steam, so roll with me. Hope is a super hot, but is doing her laundry at a corner laundromat wearing socks with flip flops and doesn’t know how she got to this point. She should be a bond girl or a badass, corrupt Wall Street crony, but no. She’s scooping in generic, powdered laundry detergent into these machines that don’t really get her whites white. She’s managed to shrink her t-shirt, which she didn’t want to wear today, but it was last clean thing she had since her stackable washer and dryer went on the fritz, so now she has to go to this dimly, fluorescent-lit, quarte- munching house of cleaning robots and avoid eye contact with with the bro in cut off sweat pants and a Monster Energy shirt. Paranoia is setting in. What is she becoming? FIN

You wish you did laundry as hard as I do! #laundrygamestrongAF ???? Shirt @civilregime

A photo posted by Hola Bonjour!???? (@hopeisabelhoward) on

8. Fitz and the Tantrums “Complicated”

The struggles of relationships – the ups and downs. It’s a subject as old as time. At the core of this song is the strife of addiction certain people can really develop. Is this really love or routine? Am I too lazy to leave? Is the way he hand the toilet paper a symptom of larger issues. All that and make up sex.

Reminds me of…Abigail Ratchford

Take everything I just said regarding relationships. Then imagine one of the worst petty fights you’ve ever had. Now, pretend you are having this experience with Abigail. It would still suck. #Merica!

Tribute to Kate Upton ????

A photo posted by A b i g a i l (@abigailratchford) on

9. Elle King “Good Girls”

This could literally be the only good thing that comes out of the “Ghostbusters” remake. Elle King is badass! He music sounds like songs Quentin Tarintino hasn’t gotten around to make movies for. Cool is just cool and Elle King is frosty as fu…

Reminds me of…Gaia Matisse

She is the great-granddaughter of the infamous painter, sculptor Matisse and looks like she is live quite the charmed and gives not a shit unless requited…at least that’s what I gather from her Instagram account (see my note at the beginning of this article if that sounded presumptuous).

☯♈️☮ ???? @mrjuicebox

A photo posted by Gaïa Matisse (@gmatisse) on

10. Coin “Talk Too Much”

It’s something we probably don’t talk enough about – talking too much. Though I am pretty sure this song is about making out and getting properly handsy. Summer lovin’ doesn’t need talkin’.

Reminds me of…Iskra Lawrence

Curves in all the right places and super cute. If there were ever a wicked-cute lady to have a summer crush on, it’s Iskra. She British and therefore has an accent. She models for Aerie and insists none of her photos are ever touched up, so she’s got killer self-esteem. Love that!

Here’s the full playlist for your enjoyment:

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