Boner of the Day

Boner of the Day for September 3, 2020

BONERS ROUND ONE

Boner Candidate #1: BENADRYL TIKTOK

Pharmaceutical giant Johnson & Johnson is warning parents of the perils of TikTok’s viral Benadryl challenge after several teens overdosed while performing the stunt. “The Benadryl TikTok trend is extremely concerning, dangerous and should be stopped immediately,” the antihistamine’s manufacturer told TooFab Monday about the foolhardy feat. The challenge, which involves taking enough Benadryl to hallucinate and posting the footage on the video-sharing platform, was blamed for the death of a 15-year-old Oklahoma girl last month, reports local news station KFOR. According to the report, the faith-driven teen was happy and “not one to experiment with drugs.” The harebrained experiment also resulted in the hospitalizations of at least three young people in Fort Worth, Texas, in May, KFOR reports. Unfortunately, the dozen or so doses required to induce hallucination can also “cause something potentially life-threatening,” according to Scott Schaeffer, director of the Oklahoma Center for Poison and Drug Information. “Large amounts of Benadryl can cause seizures and, particularly, problems with the heart. The heart tends to go out of rhythm and not pump blood effectively,” he added.

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Boner Candidtate #2: I JUST GOTTA VAPE

Leesburg, FL — A 19-year-old Floridian arrested after she pulled her pants down and urinated in front of a cop car made matters worse on her way to jail when she allegedly offered to perform a sex act on a patrolman in exchange for her Juul e-cigarette, records show. Madison Ann Bryant was charged Sunday with disorderly intoxication, a misdemeanor, and offering a bribe to a public servant, a felony. She was released that evening from the Lake County jail after posting $3000 bond. Cops discovered Bryant around 2:20 AM sitting in the median of US 27 in Leesburg, a city about 45 miles northwest of Orlando. Bryant explained she had exited a nearby truck after arguing with the male driver about “their relationship issues.” While her 22-year-old beau was getting busted for drunk driving, Bryant–“who appeared to be heavily intoxicated”–was not facing arrest. However, as Bryant waited with deputies for a ride home, she “stated she needed to use the bathroom and wished to go on the side of the road,” according to an arrest affidavit. After a cop said he would instead drive her to a gas station to use the restroom, Bryant “pulled her pants down and urinated directly in front of” a squad car, gripping the vehicle’s push bar as traffic passed by.  Upon pulling her pants back up, Bryant was arrested for disorderly intoxication.

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Boner Candidate #3: I WAS TOO HOT!

TURKEY — A woman shocked her fellow passengers when she walked out of a plane and onto the wing of the jet to cool down. Shocking footage shows the woman walking on the wing after she opened the emergency exit because she was “too hot”. The mom-of-two from Ukraine was returning from a holiday in Turkey when she rushed to get off the plane after it landed at Boryspil Airport in Kyiv. The overheated passenger can be seen on the video clip standing on the wing of the Boeing 737-86N following the flight from Antalya. Another returning holidaymaker said: “The aircraft landed and almost all the passengers got off. “She walked almost all the way from the tail to the emergency exit row, opened the door and went out. “By that time her two children were outside the plane,and standing right next to me. “They were surprised, saying: ‘This is our mum’.” The pilot called for an ambulance, police and border guards. The woman – who clambered safely back into the aircraft – was unable to explain to police the reason for her incredible behavior. She told the authorities she was too hot, it was reported. The woman was traveling with her husband and two children for a family holiday before the start of the new term. Tests showed she was not drunk, nor on drugs.

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BONERS ROUND TWO

Boner Candidate #1: BUFFY WICKS….DOING THE PEOPLE’S WORK

WASHINGTON – California Assembly Speaker Anthony Rendon is being criticized online after denying proxy voting implemented by coronavirus concerns to a state lawmaker who recently gave birth. That lawmaker, Buffy Wicks, a Democrat, then brought her newborn baby to the Assembly floor, saying she will “*always show up” to debate on issues, such as housing. Wicks gave birth in late July and traveled with her newborn to Sacramento for the final day of the session. Legislation was debated until midnight. Proxy voting allows members unable to come to the floor during the coronavirus pandemic to designate another lawmaker as their “proxy” and cast floor votes on their behalf. Wicks, a former staffer for President Barack Obama, had been told that giving birth did not qualify her as high risk for COVID-19, according to POLITCO. “Yep, I’m here! (And so is Elly)” Wicks posted to Twitter Monday night. In a video on the Assembly floor, Wicks can be seen bouncing her 1-month-old baby and donning a face mask.

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Boner Candidtate #2: DISORDER IN THE COURT

KY — Kentucky judge accused of having sex and drinking alcohol inside a courthouse has lost her job after a judicial panel found her guilty of multiple misconduct charges. Dawn Gentry, who was serving an eight-year term as a family court judge in Kenton County, is also accused of retaliating against those who denied her sex or refused to contribute to her 2018 campaign by delaying their cases, including some that involved abused children. The Judicial Conduct Commission of the Commonwealth of Kentucky found that Gentry forced a court employee to resign so she could hire an alleged sexual partner, identified as Stephen Penrose. She then engaged in sexual activity with Penrose and one of her secretaries inside a courthouse office during work hours and allowed him to spend his shifts playing his guitar, singing in his office and drinking alcoholic beverages, the panel wrote in a report published Monday. The removal follows days of salacious testimonies and comes more than eight months after Gentry was suspended from her job pending an investigation.

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Boner Candidate #3: OKAY, TO BE GINA….HOW DID THE LEG GET THERE?

CA — A diver who takes near-daily plunges into California’s American River said he encountered an unusual item under water — a prosthetic leg — and was able to return it to its owner. Karl Bly, who runs the American River Lost & Found Facebook, said he regularly finds phones and other devices at the bottom of the water, but the prosthetic leg discovery was a first for him. “Once I got past the foot that was on it, the human-looking foot, I saw the mechanics of it and realized it was a prosthetic leg and I just knew immediately somebody needed it back,” Bly told CBS Sacramento. Bly posted a photo of the leg on his Facebook page and he soon received a message from the leg’s owner, a man named Scott. “He came down right away to pick it up. Very very thankful. He just went on and on about how he needed it to get back to work,” Bly said. Bly said the man told him the leg would have cost $15,000 to replace, making it the most expensive item the diver has fished out of the river this year. “If you’re bringing something valuable on the river, make sure it floats,” Bly said.

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