I can almost hear his buddies making whip sounds from here after a woman’s list of 22 things her boyfriend is banned from doing went viral. The list, which was found by Twitter user @kkeyes96 in a just purchased used car, includes such rules as how often the poor guy is allowed to see his friends and which ones he can remain friends with. Some of the more expected prohibitions are there like not having single girls’ phone numbers in his phone and not following them on social media, but the woman goes as far as to say that if she catches him around other women, “I [will] kill you.” Guys are understandably horrified by the list, which has been shared on several sites. One person commented, “Run!!!” while another thinks she may be justified, speculating that perhaps he cheated on her.
Well that was fun while it lasted, 15.8k likes and over 5k retweets
— Kale (@kkeyes96) August 10, 2017
While the tweet was deleted, it’s the internet so here you go:
- You are NOT to have a single girls phone number
- You are NOT to follow them on any social media (including Instagram, Snapchat, and Twitter)
- You are NOT to hang out with Keegan (including his house or anywhere in public)
- You are NOT to go to Honda without me
- You are NOT to hang out with your friends more than two times a week
- You are NOT to look at a single girl
- If girls come up to you at any place or anytime you are to WALK away
- Mo is to NOT hang out [with] us every time we hang out
- You are NOT to ask for head
- You are NOT to get mad at me about a single thing ever again
- You are NOT to bring up Tyler, Noah, Deven, or Josh ever again
- You are NOT allowed to drink unless I am with you
- I am allowed to do a phone check when EVER I please
- If we move in there are NEVER to be girls at our house
- If we move in together your friends will RARELY be allowed over
- If I catch you around girls I kill you
- You are NOT to ditch me for your friends
- Austin does NOT CONTROL WHEN I HANG OUT WITH YOU!
- We are to go on a legit date once every two weeks at least
- If I say jump you say “how high princess”
- You are to make sure you tell me you love me once a day at least so I know your not messing around
- You are to NEVER take longer than 10 mins to text me
BREAKING NEWS: 'You are not to LOOK at a single girl and you must tell me you love me once a day': Girlfriend's bizarre list of strict rules for her boyfriend goes viral. The list demands 22 things her boyfriend can't do such as not taking longer than 10-minutes to text her back. pic.twitter.com/USIUJUYiep
— Dave Vescio (@DaveVescio) October 8, 2018
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