Boner Candidate #1 I COULDN’T LET HER GO
Image by Jon Ross
A Florida man lived for months with his mother’s decomposing body while he collected her Social Security checks, authorities said. Michael Sticken kept 81-year-old Joyce Willis’ corpse on two couches pushed together, Santa Rosa County Sheriff’s investigators said. She was buried under a pile of blankets,the Pensacola News Journal reported.
Boner Candidate #2 HATE CAKES MAY BE ORDERED BY THE STUPID
Image by Thomas Berg
Meet Chuck Netzhammer, a Louisiana man who’s very upset that Walmart’s decided to cut the confederate flag from all of its offerings. He’s so upset, in fact, that he’s chosen to prove his point by ordering an ISIS cake from a Walmart employee and then going to the media when the person working the cake counter didn’t realize that what they were making was a poster for a terrorist group. How many of us would make that same mistake?
Boner Candidate #3 ARE YOU SURE THIS IS MUD?
Image by Official U.S. Navy Page
Regional health authorities confirm that cases of norovirus, a fun bug that comes with fever, vomiting, and diarrhea, reached the four digits after Mud Day in Nice June 20. An environmental review is underway, but animal fecal bacteria are a common transmission vector for norovirus, so there’s a strong suspicion that le mud was full of le merde.
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