Boner of the Day

Boner Fight for March 31st, 2020

Boner Candidate #1: ONWARD CHRISTIAN SOLDIERS

More than 1,200 people attended services at a Louisiana church, again defying the governor’s coronavirus ban against more than 50 people gathering. Tony Spell has continued to hold services all month at Life Tabernacle Church in Baton Rouge – even as the coronavirus spreads throughout the United States. More than 143,500 people have tested positive in the U.S. and as of Monday morning, the nation’s death toll was over 2,500. However, the devastating nature of the virus has not dissuaded Spell from holding services on Sunday, despite experts saying social distancing could help slow down the spread of COVID-19 infections. Spell told CBS News that 1,265 people went to his church on Sunday and defended their assembly. “We have a constitutional right to congregate,” Spell said in an email on Monday. “We will continue.”  He said they disinfect the venue daily and even boasted that it’s “cleaner” than open gas stations, Walmart and Sam’s Club. Spell offered a “no comment” when asked whether his church was still collecting donations. Earlier this month, after a weekday service, he caught criticism for his controversial remarks when he told CBS affiliate WAFB that the coronavirus was “not a concern.” “The virus, we believe, is politically motivated,”  Spell told WAFB. “We hold our religious rights dear and we are going to assemble no matter what someone says.” Read More

Boner Candidate #2: WHAT A GREAT SPORTS ICON

WBO super-middleweight champion Billy Joe Saunders saw his license suspended by British authorities on Monday after filming a video in which he gave men a detailed explanation on how to strike their wife or significant other while self-isolating due to coronavirus. The video, posted to Saunders’ social media, has since been deleted. In the video, Saunders stands by a heavy bag and says the following to the audience while occasionally throwing a punch. Your old woman is giving you a little bit of mouth, and you try to be patient, you try to be calm, cool. But on the seventh day, or sixth day should I say, you’re just about to explode. All of a sudden, she’s coming at you, spitting a bit of venom in your face, ready to say you … left the dishes out. I don’t know what you’ve done, but you’ve upset her. So as she comes in, she’s coming at you and you’ve lost it. Just keep it safe with the hands. So as she comes in, she’s just about to say, all of a sudden you explode. BAM! On the chin. Yeah, so you hit her on the chin. At this time, she may flash and see what you’re thinking. ‘Wash it up, has he done it, I can’t believe this. Whoa, what’s happened?’ She don’t know what’s happened. She’s in a state of horror at the minute. She don’t know what’s going on. That flash is coming. And all of a sudden, you just get down on that knee and spring up, so you finish her off. BAM! That should do the trick. Read More


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