Boners

Boner of the Day for April 12th, 2021

ROUND ONE

Boner Candidate #1: MY BEAUTIFUL ALIEN SCARS

Elon Musk’s girlfriend ‘Grimes’ shared a picture of herself on Instagram that featured her new new tattoo that’s meant to look like ‘alien scars.’

via Daily Mail

Boner Candidate #2: COME ON, IT’S JUST A LITTLE FROG.

After the complaint of another family in the neighborhood, a frog statuette has been taken down thanks to the Home Owner’s Association.

via Yahoo News

Boner Candidate #3: IF YOU TRY TO MAKE ME, I’LL SHOOT THE PLACE UP

‘The Stockist’ a specialty clothing store on 9th and 9th was forced to close it’s doors early after they received violent threats from a customer angry about the mask mandate.

via KSLTV

ROUND TWO

Boner Candidate #1: WHY ARE YOU LOCKING ME UP WITH THESE PEOPLE?

A rioter from January 6th’s insurrection who reportedly beat a cop with a flagpole, is complaining about being imprisoned with people who commit “inner city crimes” as his lawyer said.

via MSN

Boner Candidate #2: IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY

Wellington’s former police chief Rory Bradley, was accused of sexual abuse after many of his illicit texts were shared. In his defense, Rory said: “The text messages were meant to be funny. That’s it, that’s all it was meant to be.”

via Fox News

Boner Candidate #3: IF YOU TRY TO MAKE ME, I’LL STAB YOU

After refusing to wear a mask, or turn down his music on a Front Runner train, a man threatened to stab a police officer and a UTA employee.

via Fox News


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