Boner of the Day

Boner of the Day for April 1st, 2020

ROUND ONE

BONER CANDIDATE #1: NO, I’M FINE. I’M FINE.

A New York man with the novel coronavirus (COVID-19) hid his symptoms from hospital staff so that he would be allowed to visit his wife in the maternity ward. According to several reports, the man admitted to concealing his symptoms after his wife began to show signs of the virus shortly after giving birth. It is unclear whether either of the parents, or the newborn baby, have tested positive for the virus. The incident occurred last week at the Strong Memorial Hospital in Rochester, which is part of the University of Rochester Medicine and Rochester Regional Health group. On Monday, UR Medicine announced they would now be implementing stricter measures on hospital visitors. Hospital staff will be screening all visitors allowed into Strong, Highland and three other affiliated hospitals with maternity services for symptoms, including taking their temperatures.   Read More

BONER CANDIDATE #2: A PROPER SCIENTIST SHOULD KNOW…DON’T PUT MAGNETS UP YOUR NOSE

An Australian astrophysicist has been admitted to hospital after getting four magnets stuck up his nose in an attempt to invent a device that stops people touching their faces during the coronavirus outbreak. Dr Daniel Reardon, a research fellow at a Melbourne university, was building a necklace that sounds an alarm on facial contact, when the mishap occurred on Thursday night. The 27 year-old astrophysicist, who studies pulsars and gravitational waves, said he was trying to liven up the boredom of self-isolation with the four powerful neodymium magnets. “I have some electronic equipment but really no experience or expertise in building circuits or things,” he told Guardian Australia. “I had a part that detects magnetic fields. I thought that if I built a circuit that could detect the magnetic field, and we wore magnets on our wrists, then it could set off an alarm if you brought it too close to your face. A bit of boredom in isolation made me think of that.”   Read More

BONER CANDIDATE #3: WHAT’S ALL THIS THEN?

A British comedy club said about 20 police officers responded to the facility to shut-down a live show that actually took place more than two weeks earlier. The owners of the Hot Water Comedy Club in Liverpool, England, said a Facebook Live show featuring comedian Paul Smith hosting a selection of clips from when the club was still open led a concerned viewer to contact police and report the club for violating bans on large gatherings amid the coronavirus pandemic. Did you know as a Farm Bureau client/member, there are ways to help lower your car insurance premium? Here’s what you need to know. “I was really surprised. The first we heard about it was when we got a call from the convenience store next door, saying a full police squad had turned up at the club,” Paul Blair, one of the club’s owners, told Sky News.   Read More

ROUND TWO

BONER CANDIDATE #1: THE VERDANT VIGILANTE, BEWARE OF DOGS

Some folks will do anything to defy a near-global order to stay home and engage in social distancing during the coronavirus pandemic. Take one crafty home lockdown dweller, who went incognito as a shrub just to go outdoors without being caught. Nicholas Murray and Madeline Mai-Davies, a young couple from Stevenage in the UK, say they caught a neighbor attempting a bushy breakout and captured the stunt on camera. They shared the clip on TikTok, garnering more than 700,000 views on the app. Murray also shared two different clips of the prank, grabbing another 122,000 views. In the video, a bush with two legs can be seen scuttling from the top of their driveway down to the neighborhood drag.   Read More

BONER CANDIDATE #2: THIS IS NOT A COORDINATED RESPONSE TO THE CRISIS

Senator Elizabeth Warren is pressing federal officials for answers on why they seized at least two of Massachusetts’ recent orders for protective equipment, charging that it appears they are still interfering with states’ efforts to track down medical supplies amid the coronavirus pandemic. In a five-page letter Monday, Warren asked Peter Gaynor, the Federal Emergency Management Agency administrator, to outline how the agency is ensuring states aren’t outbid for supplies by the federal government, which she called a “new and inexplicable obstacle.” Warren also pointed to at least two instances in which Massachusetts lost orders for ventilators and hundreds of respirators after the federal government stepped in — a situation Marylou Sudders, the state’s health and human service secretary, described as: “They take what we order.” Sudders said the Trump administration also impounded a third order of 3 million masks the state had negotiated to buy earlier in March.   Read More

BONER CANDIDATE #3: IT WAS A CORONAVIRUS BAT MITZVAH

A New Jersey couple is facing multiple child endangerment charges after throwing an event with dozens of people in violation of a state emergency order against gatherings, authorities said. The Ocean County Prosecutor’s Office said Eliezer Silber, 37, and Miriam Silber, 34, of Lakewood, a town of about 100,000 near the Jersey Shore, threw a party Sunday. Lakewood police were called to the family’s home and ordered 40 to 50 people gathered in the front yard to disperse. The Silbers were charged with one child endangerment count for each of their five children, and Eliezer Silber was also charged with violating a rule or regulation adopted by the governor. They will both be required to appear in court on a date not yet determined, the prosecutor’s office said.   Read More


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