ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: MOM, WHAT’S THIS IN MY EGG.
Flager County, FL — Multiple Flager County residents recently found little plastic Easter eggs placed inside their mailboxes but instead of being filled with treats, the eggs were hiding pornographic images. Now, Flagler County deputies want to know who is responsible for the unwanted surprises. “The person who did this is not only a very sick individual but could actually be spreading COVID-19 by their actions,” Sheriff Rick Staly said. “We are working to identify the offender and put them in the Green Roof Inn. If anyone else receives something like this or has information on who did this, we ask that you call us immediately.” In each of the cases, residents reported noticing that the flag on their mailbox was in the up position and when they checked to see why, they found the egg, which contained a fish-shaped cracker, a sheet of toilet paper, a powdered drink mix and a crumbled up pornographic image. The eggs were distributed on Palm Sunday, which falls exactly one week before Easter. Deputies are hoping someone has surveillance video or information about the case. Read More
Boner Candidate #2: MY WIFE IS AN EMBARRASSMENT
Isolation Vs Quarantine: What Do They Mean Amid The Coronavirus Outbreak? The mayor of an Illinois city hit out at his wife’s “stunning lack of judgment” after she was busted by police attending a party at a bar in defiance of the state’s stay at home order issued amid the coronavirus outbreak. Alton Mayor Brant Walker said he is “embarrassed” by the incident, which occurred just days after he urged police to be more strict in implementing Governor J.B. Pritzker’s statewide order by issuing citations. Alton Police said they located several people inside the Hiram’s Tavern at around 1 a.m. on Sunday, April 5. A criminal complaint for reckless conduct, a Class A misdemeanor, was signed against every person found inside the bar, including Walker’ wife Shannon, reports The Telegraph. The gathering took place in defiance of the order banning social gatherings and forcing the closure of all non-essential businesses, which came into effect on Saturday, March 21. The bar was reportedly still operating as normal on weekends. “My wife is an adult capable of making her own decisions, and in this instance she exhibited a stunning lack of judgment,” Walker said in a statement. Read More
Boner Candidate #3: FLORIDA
This is a sad and alarming sign of the times — residents packed together, risking coronavirus exposure to line up for unemployment benefits. The city of Hialeah handed out paper unemployment forms at 4 different locations Tuesday in order to help those who were unable to file through Florida’s website or hotline … and created this troubling scene. The line was full of desperate folks — many wearing face coverings, but some not — waiting for their applications, but clearly not following social distancing guidelines of keeping 6 feet apart. Florida currently has more than 14,500 confirmed cases of COVID-19 and its death total is approaching 300, so it certainly calls into question the decision to make residents wait in line for unemployment forms. Meanwhile, food banks across the country — from Central Texas to Pittsburgh — have been overburdened far this week with miles-long lines of cars waiting to pick up food for their families. Feeding South Florida has reported a 600% increase in the number of people asking for food, and it’s a similar story for food banks across the U.S. As we reported … Jeff Bezos is donating $100 million to aid the nation’s food banks, but it’s starting to look like they’re going to need way more help than that. Read More
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ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: NO GO ON… GET OUT THERE IT’S PERFECTLY SAFE
Wisconsin’s Assembly Speaker has come under fire for urging voters to head to the polls on Election Day while dressed head to toe in protective gear saying, ‘You are incredibly safe to go out.’ Wisconsin’s controversial presidential primary elections went on today despite court challenges and concerns over the coronavirus’ outbreak, with polls opened from 7am to 8pm. Robin Vos, the Republican speaker of the Wisconsin State Assembly, defended the election, saying heading out to vote was risking ‘less exposure’ than the grocery store and postponing the election made ‘no sense’, in video by the Journal Times. Vos, volunteering at a polling station in Burlington, assured apprehensive Wisconsinites that ‘everybody is here safe’ with ‘very minimal exposure’. But critics have slammed the politician for claiming it was safe to be out in the midst of a nationwide lockdown due to the virus all while he was dressed in a face mask, gloves and protective gown. Read More
Boner Candidate #2: THEY HID THE VIRUS FROM US
Cruise line bosses ‘concealed’ infections and blocked TV news channels to fool passengers into thinking their ship was safe when it was actually a ‘coronavirus time bomb’, according to a new devastating class-action lawsuit exclusively obtained by DailyMail.com. The Costa Luminosa was marooned in the Mediterranean after suffering a horrifying on-board outbreak of Covid-19 after setting sail from Fort Lauderdale on March 5. After the roughly 2,000 passengers were finally allowed to evacuate in the French city of Marseille two weeks later, 36 tested positive for the deadly virus and seven people later died, it’s claimed. Surviving guests have now filed for negligence in federal court, saying cruise operator Costa knew an outbreak was a ‘virtual certainty’ because of what had happened on board two similar ships, the Diamond Princess and the Grand Princess, both owned by Costa’s parent company, Carnival. It says the cruise operator refused to cancel or offer refunds and then failed to properly quarantine or warn passengers when the outbreak began, quietly dropping off the sick at ports along their transatlantic route. Read More
Boner Candidate #3: KILL ‘EM
Page, Ariz. • Authorities in northern Arizona have arrested a man for writing a racist social media post accusing Navajo people of carrying the coronavirus and calling for their deaths. The Page Police Department announced Tuesday that 34-year-old Daniel Franzen was taken into custody on suspicion of attempting to incite an act of terrorism. Police say they received reports Monday of a Facebook post that urged people to use “lethal force” against the Navajo community because they were “100% infected” with COVID-19. Investigators say they traced the post to Franzen. He was booked into Coconino County jail. It was not known if Franzen had an attorney who could speak on his behalf. A police spokesman did not immediately return a call seeking comment. In a statement, Page police said any unlawful hate speech will be “aggressively investigated.” Authorities also said that anyone who makes retaliatory threats against the suspect would be subject to investigation as well. The city of Page borders the Navajo Nation, the nation’s largest Native American reservation. The tribe has had more than 380 coronavirus cases and 15 deaths on its reservation that extends into Arizona, New Mexico and Utah. Read More
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