ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: THE TEACHER DIDN’T THINK OF ANY RACIAL IMPLICATIONS WITH IT…AND THAT IS THE EXACT PROBLEM.
Summit Academy High School in Bluffdale recently promoted their “lunch jail” fundraiser on social media by posting a cartoon image of a black child who is wearing a jumpsuit and is behind bars.
Boner Candidate #2: I THINK ONE IS TOO MANY.
The DWR has stopped the hunt for the rare Trumpeter Swan 16 days before the hunting season begins because the limit of 20 swans has already been reached for hunters.
Boner Candidate #3: I LISTEN TO DR. ROGAN.
UFC President Dana White recently spoke on a podcast about taking Joe Rogan’s medical advice to combat a breakthrough case of COVID-19, including taking ivermectin.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: WELL HELL, NOW WE’RE GONNA HAVE TO CUT THE OTHER ONE OFF.
An Austrian surgeon was fined about the equivalent of $3,000 after she amputated the wrong leg of an elderly patient, who died before the case was brought to court.
Boner Candidate #2: IF BIG SNAKE SAYS JUMP I SAY ‘HOW HIGH’.
A Louisiana man has been arrested after he was found trying to enter a woman’s apartment because a “big snake” told him to. He also admitted to smoking crack within the hour.
Boner Candidate #3: IT WAS A VERY REALISTIC ARM.
An Italian man who attempted to get the COVID-19 vaccine while wearing a silicone arm is now facing charges of fraud.
