Boners

Boner of the Day for December 9, 2020

ROUND ONE

Boner Candidate #1: THANKS RUDY

Hours after Michigan state Rep. Cynthia A. Johnson blasted Republicans for inviting President Donald Trump’s personal attorney, Rudy Giuliani, to hold a hearing last week with supposed witnesses of voter fraud, the Democratic lawmaker’s phone began ringing nonstop. Over the span of two days, Johnson, who is Black, received nearly 100 calls from angry Trump supporters, according to a Facebook post with 10 screenshot images of the incoming calls, which she called “a sampling.” She had been doxed, she said, and now her harshest critics had a direct line to aim their racist threats. “You should be swinging from a f—— rope, you Democrat,” one woman said in a voice mail laced with racial slurs, according to Johnson’s Facebook post linking to a recording of the message. Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer, D, condemned the harassment on Monday, calling it “not acceptable.” “Hate and violence have no place in Michigan,” Whitmer said at a news conference, adding that Michigan residents should move on from an election won by President-elect Joe Biden a month ago.

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Boner Candidate #2: WE GOT RATS EATING ALL OUR AVOCADOS

Workers at an Upper Manhattan Chipotle restaurant say they’ve been fighting a losing battle against hordes of hungry rats — and a management team that let the infestation get so bad that four staffers have been bitten by the massive rodents. The besieged fast-casual Mexican joint on Broadway near West 169th Street in Washington Heights closed to customers indefinitely late last month, but only after rats chewed through the wiring of a computer system that handled orders, two employees told The Post. In the meantime, those workers are still going into the store to clean, in an effort to keep the vermin at bay. They say they’ve killed dozens of the rodents by stomping on them, smacking them with broom handles, dropping boxes on them and various other medieval methods of extermination. “It really started to take a toll on us,” said Melvin Paulino, a three-year veteran at the store who was bitten by a rat last Friday while cleaning. “We’re all scared, it’s pretty common that some of my co-workers will just start screaming out of the blue and we don’t know what’s happening. “It’s pure chaos every time a rat appears.”

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Boner Candidate #3: ARRESTED FOR BEING OFFENSIVE

An Egyptian model has been arrested along with her photographer for taking an “offensive” photoshoot in front of a 4,700-year-old pyramid. TikTok influencer Salma al-Shimi dressed up in a revealing ancient Egyptian costume when she visited the Pyramid of Djoser, just outside of Cairo on Monday, November 30. Footage shared on her account shows the 26-year-old fashion model posing in a white Pharaonic-style dress barely containing her breasts. She flings the crook and flail props around while walking around the ancient Egypt burial site. Both Salma and her photographer Hossam Mohammad were arrested by the tourism police as officials deemed the photoshoot “offensive” to the country’s history, according to local media site Al Ahram.

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ROUND TWO

Boner Candidate #1: THE BIKINI HELPS ME SPEAK TO TRUTH

The “Baywatch” star, 53, made an attempt to get President Donald Trump’s attention on Monday by posting a photo of herself in a bikini while holding a sign that read, “Bring Julian Assange Home Australia.” A second sign read, “I am Julian Assange. #FreeAssange.” “@POTUS please #pardonjulianassange,” she tweeted. Assange was arrested at the Ecuadorian embassy in London in April 2019 after Ecuador withdrew his asylum. He is currently in a British prison awaiting an extradition trial to the U.S., where he will face espionage charges. He was charged with conspiracy to commit computer intrusion for aiding Chelsea Manning in the cracking of a password to a classified U.S. government computer in 2010, the U.S. Justice Department announced. Anderson has visited Assange in prison. In an interview with “Good Morning Britain” in September 2019, Anderson advocated for the WikiLeaks founder’s asylum and innocence. “He was right seeking asylum because everything he said was going to happen, happened,” she explained at the time. “He’s just a fantastic guy. I saw him, he hugged me and picked me up off the ground. He’s still this testament of human spirit.”

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Boner Candidate #2: HOW PROPAGANDA HAPPENS

Patricia is suffering from an unexplained skin condition – but a misunderstanding about what might have caused it set off a chain of events that turned her foot into fodder for anti-vaccine activists. The picture showed purple and red sores, swollen and oozing with pus. “Supposedly this is a [vaccine] trial participant,” read the message alongside it. “Ready to roll up your sleeve?”
Within a day, those same feet had been mentioned thousands of times on Instagram and Facebook. The picture went viral on Twitter as well. “See they are trying to deliberately hurt us with the vaccine,” one tweet read. The feet belong to Patricia – a woman in her 30s living in Texas. And it’s true – she was a participant in a trial for the Pfizer/BioNTech vaccine that started to be administered on Tuesday. But this is also true: Patricia never received the actual vaccine. Medical records show that she received a placebo, a small injection of salt water. (Researchers do this as a matter of routine, to compare groups that receive a drug or a vaccine with those who receive the placebo.) Her illness had nothing to do with injections. But that didn’t stop activists twisting her story to advance their own agendas. And on top of the physical pain caused by her condition, Patricia received a wave of online abuse.

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Boner Candidate #3: WELCOME TO WEST TEXAS

A Texas teenager is calling out his high school for actions he’s deemed homophobic and sexist. Clyde High School senior Trevor Wilkinson, 17, returned from Thanksgiving break with his finger nails painted, and he instantly received in-school suspension for violating the school’s dress code. An openly gay Texas teenager is calling out his school for their refusal to let him rock finger nail polish. “Imagine your school not allowing boys to paint their nails and giving boys ISS [in-school suspension] for it,” he said in a Nov. 30 tweet. “And the whole administration being okay with it, homophobic and sexist? Welcome to West Texas.” Wilkinson launched a Change.org petition that same day, garnering more than 71,000 signatures and counting, saying he feels his school’s actions are a complete double standard because girls are allowed to paint their nails. “Not only that, but freedom of expression is validation enough that the dress code and policy is not okay,” the petition continued. “I am a gay male and I’m beyond proud. This is unjust and not okay.”

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