ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: OH, I KNOW THE NAME OF THAT SNAKE.
A woman in South Caroline called the cops to report a home intruder. The intruder was a snake.
Boner Candidate #2: NICK FUENTES? NEVER HEARD OF HIM.
Majorie Taylor Greene claimed that she didn’t know who Nick Fuentes was, despite being a surprise speaker at a white nationalist event that he organized.
Boner Candidate #3: HER HUSBAND IS A TRADITIONALIST. HE LIKES TO DO THINGS THE OLD FASHIONED WAY.
A woman on Reddit claimed that her husband wanted to have a child with her sister ‘the traditional way’ after multiple failed attempts to have a child.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: THE BIG QUESTION, OF COURSE, IS WHY DIDN’T YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT AT THE TIME?
Former attorney general Bill Barr has a 600 page book coming out titled “One Damn Thing After Another” which is about his many problems with the twice-impeached president Donald Trump.
Boner Candidate #2: NEVER TRY TO DEPRIVE A MAN OF THE BBQ SAUCE HE HAS COMMING TO HIM.
A man in Texas fire shots because of an argument with restaurant workers over barbecue sauce.
Boner Candidate #3: IT’S ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL THEY CONFISCATE YOUR ITALIAN VILLA.
Russian TV host, Vladimir Soloviev who spread anti-Ukrainian hate to enable Putin’s war, is now crying about the loss of his Italian villa because of the war.
