Boner of the Day

Boner Of the day for June 6th, 2019

Round 1

Boner Candidate #1: I’D SAY IT WAS AN EMERGENCY

A Taco Bell in Louisiana ran out of taco shells Monday, which was emergency enough for one customer to call police.
Police in Slidell say someone called to complain that the Taco Bell on Gause Boulevard had run out of both hard and soft taco shells.
“While this is truly a travesty, the police can’t do anything about this,” the department wrote on its Facebook page, calling it a “we can’t make this stuff up” story.
While there was no word on the status of taco shells at the Louisiana location, Slidell police said they hoped the situation would be resolved in time for Taco Tuesday.

Boner Candidate #2: WE DON’T CARE IF YOU ARE COMFORTABLE AT WORK

Japan’s health, labour and welfare minister, Takumi Nemoto, said it was ‘appropriate’ that women wear heels in the workplace. Photograph: Issei Kato/Reuters
Japan’s health and labour minister has defended workplaces that require women to wear high heels to work, arguing it is “necessary and appropriate” after a petition was filed against the practice.
The remark came when Takumi Nemoto was asked to comment on a petition by a group of women who want the government to ban workplaces from requiring female jobseekers and employees to wear high heels. “It is socially accepted as something that falls within the realm of being occupationally necessary and appropriate,” Nemoto told a legislative committee on Wednesday.
The petition was submitted to the labour ministry on Tuesday. The campaign has been dubbed #KuToo, a play on words from the Japanese word “kutsu”, meaning shoes, and “kutsuu”, meaning “pain”. It is also a reference to the global #MeToo movement against sexual abuse.

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Boner Candidate #3: HOW’S ABOUT A LITTLE STRAIGHT PRIDE, HUH?

CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — As Boston celebrated Pride Week, an annual event honoring the L.G.B.T. rights movement that culminates in a parade, another event was drawing a flurry of attention on social media: a “Straight Pride Parade” that several men say they plan to hold in the city in late August. Officials at City Hall said the organizers have yet to receive a permit for a parade, and it appeared uncertain this week whether the event, described on a website the organizers created, would actually take place. The group had earlier sought an application to raise a “straight pride” flag on City Hall’s flagpoles, a proposal city officials turned down. It was also unclear whether the real intent of the event was a serious argument that straight Americans were oppressed and needed protection from discrimination, as the website suggests, or if it was meant to be a joke — and if so, what kind of joke. One of the organizers, John Hugo, said in an interview that the intent was “lighthearted” and that the organizers bore no ill will toward gay people. One of the other organizers was gay, he noted, adding that the parade’s keynote speaker would be “a famous, prominent gay guy.” “People are really triggered about this,” he said. “We just wanted to have a little parade.” Mr. Hugo was the Republican candidate for the state’s Fifth Congressional District last fall, losing the election to an incumbent.

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Round 2

Boner Candidate #1: YOU CAN’T TALK TO GOD IN COACH.

A prominent televangelist who has come under fire for his use of extravagant planes has reaffirmed his need for private jets, saying, “It’s a biblical thing.” Kenneth Copeland, a Texas-based preacher, in 2015 defended his use of private planes, saying that you can’t “talk to God” while flying on a commercial airline. He’s also said one “can’t manage that today, in this dope-filled world, get in a long tube with a bunch of demons.” Last month, in an exchange with a magazine reporter that’s since gone viral, Copeland was pressed on his past statements and asked if he really believed humans are demons, The Washington Post reports. “No, I do not, and don’t you ever say I did,” Copeland told Inside Edition reporter Lisa Guerrero. “It’s a biblical thing, it’s a spiritual thing, it doesn’t have anything to do with people. People? I love people. Jesus loves people. But people get pushed in alcohol. Do you think that’s a good place for a preacher to be and prepare to preach?”

Boner Candidate #2: NO NO NO

Everywhere you turn these days it seems like hemlines and t-shirt lengths are getting shorter and shorter by the second, with some forgoing clothing all together and wearing underwear as outwear. But it’s not just women who will be baring their midriffs and showing some skin this summer. That’s because ASOS are currently selling a number of cropped tops and bandeau-style ‘boob tubes’ especially for men – this includes cropped tanks, cropped sweatshirts and even cropped shirts. However the new trend has divided opinions online and sparked a heated debate. Many have not been shy about sharing their dislike for the tops. One user wrote: “If I start seeing men in crop tops this summer I’m done.” Another asked: “ASON (as seen on nobody). Would be genuinely interested in seeing the sales figures… I can’t imagine anyone buying that!” A third said: “Every time I have a gander on ASOS only thing that keeps getting shoved in my face is men’s crop tops, get them f***ed off big time, who’s even buying s**** like that?” Others just thought some of the designs were poor as they looked like one shirt that had been cut into pieces. However not everyone saw a problem with the garments.A different user said: “ASOS are selling men’s crop tops and people are complaining… YOU’RE NOT BUYING IT SO WHY DOES IT AFFECT YOU?” Someone else posted: “Why the heck not? He looks awesome and he’s killing it.”

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Boner Candidate #3: POO CHEESE

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