ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: HE NEEDED THE MEAT FOR HIS FAMILY.
The Millard County Attorney is charging Rep. Travis Seegmiller with one count of unlawful taking of protected wildlife and two counts of unlawful discharge of a firearm for shooting a deer in a residential area in Washington County.
Boner Candidate #2: BEFORE HE DOES ANYTHING, CHECK THE DOCTOR’S GLOVES.
Medical gloves being imported from a company in Thailand appear to be used gloves that have been cleaned and repackaged to be sold as new.
Boner Candidate #3: ANOTHER CLASSY MOVE BY THE TRUMP FAMILY.
Following the accidental shooting by Alec Baldwin, Donald Trump Jr. has started selling shirts on his official website that mock the event.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: YEAH. YOU PEOPLE ARE REAL PATRIOTS.
On Thursday, the Salt Lake County Council voted to overturn the K-6 mask mandate. The six Republicans voted to overturn the mandate, the three Democrats voted to uphold the mandate.
Boner Candidate #2: I’M NOT GONNA ANSWER THAT.
A hiker reported missing on Mount Elbert in Colorado ignored phone calls from rescuers because they were unfamiliar with the phone number.
Boner Candidate #3: NO PICTURES WITH GUYS WITH NO PAINTED NAILS.
After a Clippers vs. Grizzlies game on Saturday, a fan saw Floyd Mayweather and asked for a selfie. Mayweather told the fan, “you got painted nails, I don’t take pictures with guys with no painted nails”.