ROUND ONE
BONER CANDIDATE #1: WELL, HE KNEW WHERE IT WAS AND HOW TO GET THERE.
32 year-old Ronald Hill Jr. of Fairfax County, VA has been arrested for robbing the same 7-11 four different times.
BONER CANDIDATE #2: I THOUGHT THE COPS LIKE DONUTS.
A man in Durham was arrested for doing donuts in the parking lot of a police station at 1:45am on Wednesday.
BONER CANDIDATE #3: FINGER FOOD.
A woman in Bolivia found part of a decomposing finger in her fast food burger after a factory employee lost their finger while prepping the meat.
ROUND TWO
BONER CANDIDATE #1: YOU DON’T NEED A BIGGER BOAT, YOU NEED A BIGGER CAR.
Police in Eugene gave a driver who was towing a boat through the trunk of a sedan a warning for safety issues.
BONER CANDIDATE #2: TOAD SMOKING TOURISTS IN TULUM.
“Speed-toading” is a new phenomenon where tourists in Mexico are smoking hallucinogenic toad venom.
BONER CANDIDATE #3: HE EVEN SWIPED MY SON’S UNDERWEAR.
A man in Ohio was charged with burglary after a homeowner found him sleeping in their guest room, using their pool and wearing their son’s underwear.
