Boners

Boner of the Day for January 23rd, 2023

Boner Candidate #1: Temp Job Title “Temp Pot Dealer”

A temporary lunch lady from Jewel M. Sumner High School is baked in a sticky situation after she was arrested Friday for selling pot brownies. The students turned in the lunch lady as proof by Superintendent Melissa Stilley, because she had this to say, “I want to commend this student who saw something and used the app to bring this threat to the attention of our school officials and law enforcement.”  Stilley urged, “The safety of our students is of the utmost importance to our school system.”

via Upper Michigan Source

 

Boner Candidate #2: I’m Not As Think as you Drunk I Am!

Always be there for your friends, even when you’re drunk. Doesn’t mean that you’ll get the results you want but at least you’ll be a good friend. A woman was stopped after law enforcement suspected she was more than just intoxicated. She took the time during the traffic stop to call a friend for help. Like a reliable friend, they shown up. Unlike a reliable friend, they too were arrested for driving under the influence. The friends were both drinking together earlier while playing trivia according to the police.

via mLIVE

 

Boner Candidate #3: Are those eggs in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

Egg smugglers at the border are causing a clucking mess. Even as messy as egg prices are, around $4.25 to $7 for just a mere dozen eggs, causing many to get eggs anywhere they can at the lowest price. Border patrol has seen an increasing in seizing eggs at the border at a 108% increase. Jennifer De La O, the Director of Field Operations of the CPB said, “As a reminder, uncooked eggs are prohibited entry from Mexico into the U.S. Failure to declare agriculture items can result in penalties of up to $10,000.”

via Food and Wine

 

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