Boners

Boner of the Day for June 4th, 2019

Boner 1

Candidate #1: IT’S BUSINESS DECISION

It’s a move that’s been branded ‘disgusting’ and ‘sexist’ on social media.
But Tatprof stand behind their decision to offer women bonuses throughout the month of June if they wear skirts or dresses to work. The Russian aluminium manufacturer has launched a ‘femininity marathon’ campaign where female employees can earn 100 roubles (£1.19) on top of their regular wage if they wear certain clothing to work. In order to claim this extra cash there are a few more stipulations – the skirt or dress must be “no longer than five centimetres from the knee” and they have to send photographic proof of themselves wearing it to the company. The bizarre scheme has enraged many women on Twitter who have criticised the business. One person wrote: “Wow… So Tatprof is running a femininity contest for its employees in Russia, basically it seems so the bosses can gawk over the pictures. Disgusting abuse of power and exploiting women.”

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Candidate #2: CAN YOU IDENTIFY THE ASSAILANT?

Yes, Ethan Bramble looks unusual. He also posts unusual messages for Australian police while they seek him on an assault charge, the BBC reports. “Nananana you’ll never catch me,” the 23-year-old posted on Facebook with a pic of him eating ice cream, per Australia’s News Network. “Cream on brothers.” The fact that Bramble is 98% covered in tattoos (including his eyes), has a forked tongue, and a silicon spider under his skin has already drawn media attention. Now there’s the alleged assault. “He is described as caucasian, with a thin build,” say police, who also note his tattoos “and gauges approximately 10cm in diameter in both earlobes.” Bramble told his 200,000-plus Facebook followers Thursday that it’s all a misunderstanding—now “sorted out” with cops—after he tossed a beer can near his ex-girlfriend in a bar, per Fox News. But Victoria police said Friday the warrant remained active. “I smoke too much, I drink too much, I don’t want to go to jail,” said Bramble. “Hopefully I don’t get life in prison, later crew.”

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Candidate #3: DON’T FORGET THE TROPHY

An Indiana father says he was “blindsided” after a teacher gave his 11-year-old son, who has autism, an award for “most annoying male.”
“We just weren’t expecting it,” dad Rick Castejon told the The Times of Northwest Indiana. “As a principal or teacher, you should never let this happen to any student.” Castejon said a special education teacher at Bailly Preparatory Academy in Gary handed out the awards in May during an annual end-of-year ceremony and luncheon for fifth-graders.
The Times reported that the parents attending the event at a Golden Corral restaurant became silent as the boy received the trophy. Castejon told the paper he tried to leave the engraved trophy on a table, but the unidentified female teacher reminded him not to forget it, and acted like it was all in fun

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Boner 2

Candidate #1: REALLY DAD. REALLY?

A father from Lackawanna County turned himself in to face more than a dozen charges of identity theft and fraud. His own son is his alleged victim. Police say Michael Trichilo Sr. wrecked his son’s credit over the span of six years. Michael Trichilo Sr., of Throop, turned himself in at the Lackawanna County Courthouse Friday morning. He was arraigned on 18 felony counts, including identity theft and fraud. His son Michael Jr. was not originally a cooperating witness in this case, telling detectives he did not want to file charges against his father, but earlier this year, investigators say his father left him with no choice. Lackawanna County detectives say Trichilo Sr. allegedly using his son’s Social Security number to rack up $120,000 in debt. Investigators would eventually find that Trichilo started the fraud when his son was just 14.

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Candidate #2: THIS IS AN ANTI ABORTION MEASURE

A bill had sought to establish 16 as the minimum legal age of marriage in Louisiana. But lawmakers in the state House shut it down. The Louisiana House has rejected a bill that sought to establish a minimum age to marry in the state, with some conservative lawmakers asserting that many 16-year-olds “are very mature” and that marriage can be a beneficial option for teenagers especially if they are expecting a child. “We want children to be born into wedlock if possible,” Republican state Rep. Nancy Landry said, according to The Advocate. “We’re discouraging that with this. If they’re both 16 or 15 and having a baby why wouldn’t we want them to get married?”

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Candidate #3: A SYMBOL OF THE LIE OF HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION

Things took a turn at a graduation party when a family learned that the cake they purchased wasn’t chocolate or vanilla – but Styrofoam.

Nellie Flores told ABC7’s sister station KTRK-TV that she and her sister, Marsy, ordered a graduation cake from a Walmart in Pasadena, Texas, last week. The two-tier cake was for Marsy’s daughter who was having a graduation party. When it came time to pick up the cake on Thursday, Nellie and Marsy learned that it had not been made. They said a Walmart store manager told them to choose any cake from the ones that were ready to go. They took one of the cakes and put a photo on it. Everything was fine until it was time to cut the cake. That’s when they discovered it was made of Styrofoam.

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