Boner Candidate #1: SURE, EXERCISE IS IMPORTANT BUT…
A mom recently discovered that her husband has been keeping a reckless secret from her. Her husband has been leaving their 15-month-old baby at home, with no supervision, to go on daily runs. He was keeping it a secret from her until she was told about it from someone else. “We have a jogging stroller, treadmill, stationary bike and a full gym setup AT HOME,” she said
Boner Candidate #2: WE DON’T WANT OUR STUDENTS TO BE WOKE. WE WANT THEM TO BE STUPID.
Ryan Walter, the Oklahoma’s State Superintendent, unleashes a new, revised curriculum standard. The new rules, which have been met with outrage by parents, students, and immigration advocates, will promote Republican ideologies and removing “Wokeness” from schools. This new curriculum will ask high schoolers to find or identify “discrepancies” in the 2020 elections. The previous standard for studying the 2020 election merely said: “Examine issues related to the election of 2020 and its outcome.” The new version now states: “Identify discrepancies in 2020 elections results by looking at graphs and other information, including the sudden halting of ballot-counting in select cities in key battleground states, the security risks of mail-in balloting, sudden batch dumps, an unforeseen record number of voters, and the unprecedented contradiction of ‘bellwether county’ trends.”
!!! WINNER !!!
Boner Candidate #3: YEAH, JILL’S A DOCTOR. SHE SHOULD HAVE SPOTTED JOE’S CANCER
Only a few hours after responding to Joe Biden about his speedy recovery, Donald Trump Jr. posted on X (Twitter) his critique on the news. After sharing his message Trump Jr then began questioning how long Biden had known this and if the White House knew about it. He even posted “What I want to know is how did Dr. Jill Biden miss stage five metastatic cancer or is this yet another coverup???” as a stab at Jill Biden. Biden’s office made a statement on Sunday announcing the diagnosis after Biden had seen an increase of urinary symptoms.
