ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: STAY DOWN
A woman posted on Reddit over the weekend that her campsite was riddled by gunfire after sunset on Friday. “We started hearing bullets hissing and whizzing through our campsite,” said the woman named Jillian who only wanted her first name used for fear of retaliation. “Those 30 minutes were probably one of my most terrifying moments of my life.” On the social media posting, another person responded noticing the same illegal shooting at a nearby campsite. Jillian, her boyfriend and dog were camping in a meadow at a higher point the canyon. The bullets came from a campsite in a lower portion of the canyon.
Boner Candidate #2: GO TOPLESS!
A raucous Texas beach event known as “Go Topless Jeep Weekend” ended with two people hospitalized following a shooting and nearly 200 others arrested on various charges. Galveston County Sheriff Henry Trochesset said two men were airlifted to the hospital after both of them were shot in the torso during the annual event on Bolivar Peninsula, which brings together thousands of Jeep lovers and 4-wheeler enthusiasts. A group of men and women were arguing when the fight escalated and gunshots rang out, Trochesset told NBC News. The conditions of the two men who were hospitalized haven’t been released. Authorities are looking for a third man who fled, the sheriff said Tuesday. No arrests were made in the shooting, and the investigation is ongoing. By the time the gathering ended, more than 180 attendees had been taken into custody on numerous unrelated charges.
Boner Candidate #3: JUST GETTING MY REPS IN
Calling it “reckless behavior,” the Milwaukee Police Department is asking for the public’s help to track down a man who was caught on video doing push-ups on top of a moving vehicle. In the video, you can see the man climb out of the rear passenger-side window, and onto the roof of the moving car. The shirtless man then does about two push-ups before the video ends. Police said the incident was captured by a driver who was in the area of N. 91st Street and W. Capitol Drive over the weekend. Police said the incident has been circulating on social media.
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ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1:ANOTHER KIND AND HUMAN REPUBLICAN
Republican congressional candidate Ted Howze said earlier this month he had nothing to do with social media posts from his personal accounts that demeaned Muslims, accused prominent Democrats of murder and mocked a survivor of the Parkland school shooting. The “negative and ugly ideas,” he asserted, were penned by others whom he’d given access to his accounts, but he declined to name them. In the weeks since his denial, new questions have emerged about that explanation. At least a dozen additional posts from Howze’s account over a two-year period espouse conspiracy theories, suggest Hillary Clinton and Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-Fla.) are responsible for murder, ordenigrate Dreamers, Islam and the Black Lives Matter movement. As of Tuesday afternoon, they were accessible on his personal Facebook account.
Boner Candidate #2:BECAUSE ONE QUARTER OF AMERICANS ARE STUPID
A quarter of Americans have little or no interest in taking a coronavirus vaccine, a Reuters/Ipsos poll published on Thursday found, with some voicing concern that the record pace at which vaccine candidates are being developed could compromise safety. While health experts say a vaccine to prevent infection is needed to return life to normal, the survey points to a potential trust issue for the Trump administration already under fire for its often contradictory safety guidance during the pandemic. Some 36% of respondents said they would be less willing to take a vaccine if U.S. President Donald Trump said it was safe, compared with only 14% who would be more interested. Most respondents in the survey of 4,428 U.S. adults taken between May 13 and May 19 said they would be heavily influenced by guidance from the Food and Drug Administration or results of large-scale scientific studies showing that the vaccine was safe.
Boner Candidate #3:I JUST GOT OUT OF THE JOINT AND I’M CONFUSED
A Clearwater man awoke to his dogs barking on a recent morning to find a naked man in his kitchen. The man’s dogs awoke him about 6:30 a.m. Friday at his home on Barry Street in Clearwater. That’s when the homeowner found the naked man, Clearwater police reported. The homeowner told the intruder to get out of his house, at which point the naked man grabbed two knives and ran away, police said. Police, with the help of a K-9, found the man nearby in an enclosed screen porch hiding under a swing. Officers arrested him on two charges of armed burglary. Police said three people were in the house on Barry Street at the time of the intrusion, including a 3-month-old baby. Police identified the intruder as Jesse Ramon Conover, 32, of Clearwater. Arrest reports indicate he appeared to be under the influence of drugs when he was arrested.
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