Boner Candidate #1: A CAR IS NOT A RESTROOM
A quick stop at Maverik in Murray to grab a drink has Kasey Rose thanking her lucky stars she didn’t leave her children in the car. Rose watched a man steal her car seconds after she entered the store. “I left my car running because it was a little bit chilly,” Rose said. “I had my keys strapped to my purse, because I was wearing it around my body.” The car was locked, but Rose was standing close enough to the store entrance that the car picked up her electric key fob when the man tried to get in. “I look around and I see it reversing by itself,” Rose said. “All I could do was just shriek: ‘Somebody is taking my car.’” Rose’s cell phone was in her car, so she borrowed a phone to call her husband. Police and her husband chased the suspect, tracking the car’s location through Rose’s cell phone. “At one point my husband was so close that the guy that stole my car almost hit my husband,” Rose said. The man threw Rose’s cell phone out of the car. Hours later, Rose said her husband found their car using a car app. What they found inside was shocking.
Boner Candidate #2: DO NOT GROPE THE PERSON BOOKING YOU.
This hands-on suspect wasn’t hard to catch. A Florida man busted for disorderly conduct in a bar upped the ante by groping the fingerprint technician at his booking. Jack Dylan Evans started his Wednesday afternoon by harassing the female owner of a watering hole where he’d been asked to leave, according to court papers obtained by the Smoking Gun. He then accosted the officer fingerprinting him in Pinellas County, Fla., because “she was sexy.” The 44-year-old perp was apprehended afternoon after shouting obscenities inside Down the Hatch bar, then telling the proprietor he wanted to have sex with her, according to the report. Cops said their arrival didn’t slow Evans down, whose foul-mouthed tirade continued after he was apprehended. At the station, he groped a fingerprint technician, according to the report. “The (defendant) reached with his left hand down to the victim’s right buttocks area and rubbed the area as the victim was fingerprinting the subject as part of the booking process,” the report said. That act was allegedly caught on video and battery was added to Evans’ charges.
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