Boner of the Day

Boner Fight for May 24th, 2019

Boner Candidate #1: PACK IT UP GRANNY; YOU’RE OUT.

A 102-year-old woman is being forced out of her home in Ladera Heights, California, according to KCBS. Family and friends of Thelma Smith are banding together after she received an eviction notice and is being forced to relocate. Smith’s landlord intends to move his daughter into the residence once she graduates from law school. Smith has lost most of her family over the years, including her husband, and her remaining family lives on the East Coast. Her family and friends said her options are limited to moving in with someone nearby or moving into assisted living which is difficult to do on her fixed income. “Right now it’s the unknown that’s bothering her as far relocating her to her new places,” said family friend Antonio Avelino. “She couldn’t afford it she would need some assistance from county and other friends to support her in these places.” KCBS’ Amy Johnson spoke to the landlord. “We know legally you can make her leave but 102? Would you kick out a 102-year-old woman?” asked Johnson. The landlord replied by saying, “Would you take care of your child?” “The only thing that I can say is that I’ve tried to live a good life. I’ve never wanted to harm anybody,” said Smith. Smith must vacate the house by June 30.

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Boner Candidate #2: PARENTING CLASSES?…HOW ABOUT FORCED STERILIZATION?

A California woman accused of trying to drown her newborn in a McDonald’s restroom avoided jail time last week after striking a plea deal with prosecutors and pleading no contest to felony child endangerment. Sarah Jane Lockner, 27, received four years of supervised probation and was ordered to take parenting classes. SFGate reported, citing court documents. Lockner reportedly agreed to the plea deal in January. She was originally charged with attempted murder. Lockner was in the middle of a shift at a McDonald’s in Redwood City in the Bay Area in September 2017 when she was complaining of stomach pains, according to the San Mateo County District Attorney’s Office. When her fellow employees noticed she was trailing blood, Lockner told them she had a “heavy period.” A co-worker went to check on Lockner in the restroom and allegedly discovered Lockner with the newborn’s head face-down in a toilet bowl, according to prosecutors. Lockner reportedly told the co-worker not to call police, but the co-worker did anyway, according to the Mercury News of San Jose. Responding officers found the baby not breathing and without a pulse, the newspaper reported. The baby was rushed to a hospital and survived. The child is reportedly staying with the father’s aunt.

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