Round One
Boner Candidate #1: I want my big rooster back!
A $1,000 reward for the return of a giant rooster was offered by a family restaurant who’s giant rooster statue went missing. The statue stands at 12 feet tall, and 4 feet wide.
Boner Candidate #2: RHOSL Zoom Bomb
Jen Shah, from the ‘Real Housewives of Salt Lake City’ had her trial rescheduled after a swam of people ‘zoom-bombed’ their way into the trial. Most of them, were just fans of the show but due to the volume of people, Jen Shah and her attorney weren’t able to join the meeting themselves.
Boner Candidate #3: So, if I’m doing the math right, that’s 39 masseuses?
Deshaun Watson’s defense for his sexual assault case will feature 18 different massage therapists, who he claims have never had an issue with him.
Round Two
Boner Candidate #1: Ugh, this woman makes my blood boil!
Kristi Noem, the republican governor of South Dakota supported the transphobia of her party by issuing an executive order to block transwomen from women’s sports.
Boner Candidate #2: Cardi B has a good point, but her fans are a little off
After House Bill 72, which would implement a ‘porn filter’ on all devices brought into Utah, Cardi B tweeted about the bill calling the FLDS a ‘cult.’
Boner Candidate #3: Todd?!?
Joyrides aren’t anything new, but some Florida thieves set themselves apart by stealing a train. During their adventure, they broke two switches casuing ~$30,000 in damage.