Boner of the Day

Boner of the Day for February 27th, 2020

ROUND ONE

Boner Candidate #1: YOU HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO DANCE

A Utah mom said it’s ‘unacceptable’ that her 11-year-old daughter wasn’t allowed to say ‘no’ when asked to dance. During a Valentine’s Day dance, 11-year-old Azlyn Hobson, told our media partners at The Salt Lake Tribune, a boy who makes her feel uncomfortable asked her to dance. She said no, but then she said Rich Middle School Principal Kip Motta, came over. “He was like, ‘You guys go dance. There’s no saying ‘no’ in here,’” Azlyn said. So, Azlyn said she had to dance with the boy. “I just didn’t like it at all,” Azlyn said. “When they finally said it was done, I was like, ‘Yes!'” Azlyn’s mom, Alicia, posted on Facebook after hearing what happened. “The point is that this kid makes my daughter feel uncomfortable. She should not have to stand close to him with his hands on her if she doesn’t want to. She has the right to say no to anyone for any reason or no reason. Her body is her body and if she doesn’t want to dance with someone, that’s her prerogative,” she said on Facebook. Principal Motta said he never said that the student had to dance with the boy. “No one was forced to do anything. All they had to do was communicate with me. That’s what we tell the kids all the time,” he said. The school hosts three dances a year as part of the physical education curriculum rhythm and movement, Motta said. Read More

Boner Candidate #2: FECAL TRANSPLANT? THERE’S A YOUTUBE TUTORIAL FOR THAT

A growing number of people are turning to YouTube to learn how to give themselves fecal transplants, according to a new study documenting an alarming DIY movement. Fecal transplants involve putting stool from a healthy donor into a recipient’s intestinal tract in order to restore good bacteria to the gut. The experimental transplants are not yet officially approved by the Food and Drug Administration, but doctors are beginning to test it as a treatment for recurring Clostridium difficile, a life-threatening, diarrhea-producing, antibiotic-resistant infection. And while the costly procedure also shows some early promise for a wide variety of medical problems, it’s no silver bullet. If a donor carries diseases or bad bacteria, it could — and has been — deadly for those on the receiving end. But that’s not stopping an enterprising bunch of patients from revving up their blenders and creating their very own “slurry” of feces, according to a study published in the American Journal of Gastroenterology. A whopping 87 percent of those surveyed in the study said they’ve been facilitating fecal transplants themselves, using online tutorials, sometimes on YouTube, to create their own concoction using supposedly healthy donors’ feces. The majority were using the transplants to treat issues like inflammatory bowel disease and irritable bowel syndrome. Luckily — and surprisingly — most of the patients (82 percent) saw improvements with the procedure. Read More

Boner Candidate #3: THE RESURRECTION OF A DEAD POSSUM.

WAUKESHA, WI – Waukesha police on Monday afternoon received calls that a woman was performing a spiritual ritual on a dead possum in the road at the intersection of Springdale and Bluemound. The woman, who apparently stopped and got out of her car when she saw the possum, threw goldfish and windshield washer fluid on the dead animal, a caller told a dispatcher, according to a police call log. The woman then pulled a Green Bay Packers lawn chair out of her car and yelled “repent” at the possum, the log said. A caller, who had been following the woman’s vehicle before the incident, said the driver’s behavior was erratic, according to the log. The possum was removed from the roadway, the report said. Read More

ROUND TWO

Boner Candidate #1: IS IT THE BUS DRIVER’S FAULT THAT THE BLACK KIDS ARE NOISY?

Comal County ISD has placed a bus driver on administrative leave pending a formal investigation into claims of middle school students being segregated by their race. Steve Stanford, the district’s spokesperson, told KSAT on Tuesday that officials interviewed the bus driver during their preliminary investigation. The bus driver told officials, “the assignment of students to specific seats was based on student behavior,” Stanford said. “If there is evidence gathered that supports an intent other than student behavior for assigning seats, then appropriate disciplinary action will be taken,” Stanford said. The district said an incident happened on the bus while on the way to the school last Thursday that sparked the seat assignments. But Danville Middle School students and their parents claim that the bus driver “segregated by color.” The claims were made on Facebook in a private community group. One student said some other students were making loud noises, but she felt discriminated against after the driver handpicked students who were white to get off the bus, while selecting students of color, including herself, to remain on the bus. Read More

Boner Candidate #2: OH COME ON, WHAT’S WRONG WITH A LITTLE TOE SUCKING?

A Florida hospital worker was nailed for getting handsy with a patient’s foot. Frantz Beldorin, 23, was arrested earlier this week after allegedly sucking on a patient’s toes while on the clock at Gulf Coast Hospital in Fort Myers, according to NBC2. The shocked patient told police they felt their right foot being touched around 11 p.m. on Monday. They assumed a nurse was checking for swelling — but then they felt their foot being touched again and then again a third time, feeling something between their toes. After the third time, the patient looked up only to find Beldorin on his knees with his head bent over their foot, the news station reported. The patient yanked their foot away and Beldorin retreated back to his seat in the room, where he was working as a “sitter” for the patient’s roommate, who had been deemed a flight risk. Later on, Beldorin asked the patient if they were alright — and that’s when they called for assistance to report him to the responding nurse. Security was called and Beldorin was arrested on charges of battery on a person 65 years of age or older. He is being held at the Lee County Jail on a $1,500 bond. Read More

Boner Candidate #3: THE OLD TOILET CLOG DIVERSION

Marion County, FL — A Florida woman is suspected of utilizing a unusual method to help steal items from a dollar store. According to the Marion County Sheriff’s Office, the suspected shoplifter clogged multiple toilets at a Family Dollar store to distract employees as she fled with more than $400 worth of merchandise. The woman loaded up laundry bins with $400 of items before she went into the bathrooms and clogged the toilets, according to the Sheriff. She then reportedly took the stolen items to a nearby CVS, put them by the trash and went to talk to someone in a dark-colored SUV. The Sheriff’s Office said the SUV proceeded to drive around to the dumpsters, but when the woman spotted a Family Dollar employee by the stolen items she fled. No additional information was immediately released. Read More

 


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