Boners

Boner of the Day for June 11th, 2021

ROUND ONE

Boner Candidate #1: I’M SHOCKED THAT THERE WERE ANY FANS TO BE SHOCKED

Alicia Silverstone finally revealed the proper pronunciation of her name on TikTok. As she put it: “it’s Ali-See-yuh, not Alee-Sha”

via Fox News

Boner Candidate #2: MARK JUST LOVES STICKIN’ PIGS.

CEO of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg was seen hunting wild boar in Hawaii. This is all after he announces that he will be working from home.

via Daily Mail

Boner Candidate #3: SURE.

A survey conducted by Politico and Morning Consult has shown that 29% of republicans believe that the twice impeached former president Donald Trump will return to his position as president.

via The Sun

ROUND TWO

Boner Candidate #1: THE BEAR WAS TOO BIG TO MOVE

James Stimac is receiving 15 months of prison for killing, and beheading a black bear at the Red Lake Indian Reservation in northern Minnesota. The bear was one of 7, which isn’t allowed to be hunted by non-Indians.

via Fox News

Boner Candidate #2: HE HAD MORE CRACK THAN CAMERA EQUIPMENT

A farmer at a vineyard spotted a suspicious hat and discovered someone stuck in a large fan for two days. He claimed he liked to take pictures of farm equipment, but as the authorities said: “had far more methamphetamine than camera equipment.”

via The New York Post

Boner Candidate #3: A PERFECTLY GOOD REASON FOR SETTING A PERSON ON FIRE

After setting her husband on fire, Tuhonsty Marie Smith from Milwaukee admits that she waited for her husband to go to sleep, before burning him. She believed he had poisoned her chicken wings. Luckily, the husband wasn’t killed.

via The New York Post


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