Round One
Boner Candidate #1: POOR PETER DOOCY AND HIS BINDER FULL OF QUESTIONS.
President Joe Biden held his first news conference at the White House, where he answered questions from different news outlets. Peter Doocy, a Fox News reporter was frustrated that Biden didn’t ask him any questions from his literal binder of questions.
Boner Candidate #2: 91,500 GREASY PENNIES
An auto-shop employee’s persistent demands for his final paycheck resulted in a pile of roughly 91,500 pennies ($915).
Boner Candidate #3: YOU CANT HIDE FROM THE INTERNET
Southwest Airlines is investigating a pilot who’s expletive filled rant picked up on his unmuted microphone. His rant was about the Bay Area, and it’s ‘liberal f–ks.’
via SF Gate
Round Two
Boner Candidate #1: MADGE THE BODY SNATCHER
a TikTok user by the name of Amelia Goldie is accusing Modanna of being a body snatcher. More specifically, Goldie claims that Modanna edited her face onto Goldie’s body to steal her 2015 dance moves.
Boner Candidate #2: THEY LOVE OUR COUNTRY SO MUCH THEY TRASHED THE CAPITOL AND KILLED A COP.
Former president, and twice impeached Donald Trump defended the rioters at the U.S. capitol. During a Fox News interview with Laura Ingraham, Trump defended the rioters by saying that they: ‘they are waving the American flag, and they love our country.’ Unlike the Black Lives Matter protests who didn’t storm the U.S. capitol building injuring over 100 cops and leaving one dead.
Boner Candidate #3: IT’S NOT MY FAULT. I WAS DRUNK
A man’s attempt to cheer up his girlfriend resulted in criminal charges. Instead of a party, or a nice dinner the intoxicated man chose to shoot at the house using a shotgun which broke windows and caused minor injuries to a women inside.
