ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: HEY THIS STUFF LOOKS FAMILIAR.
Riverside, S.C. – A man suspected to stealing camera equipment from a Riverside business Wednesday tried to sell the items back to the same shop’s owner later that day, police said. The burglary at the center of the strange series of events was reported at about 10 a.m. Wednesday in the 4300 block of Market Street. Earlier that morning, the shop owner — still unaware of the crime — was walking near the business when a man approached him and offered to sell him some camera equipment that looked familiar. The owner recognized the items as equipment from his shop, so he returned to his store and realized someone had broken into the business. The owner called police to report the theft of several hundred dollars worth of camera equipment. Responding officers chased the suspect, identified as 25-year-old Johnny Robles of Indio, and caught up with him in a fenced in area. He was arrested on suspicion of commercial burglary and probation violations. He was being held on $10,000 bond.
Boner Candidate #2: HUMAN CAPITAL STOCK
While discussing whether the U.S. economy might recover this fall after the coronavirus downturn, a Trump economic advisor referred to the American worker as “human capital stock.” Senior White House Economic Adviser Kevin Hassett made the wildly insensitive remark, first flagged by Aaron Rupar on Twitter, on Sunday after CNN’s Dana Bash asked whether unemployment numbers would remain in double digits come November. “Our capital stock hasn’t been destroyed, our human capital stock is ready to get back to work, and so there are lots of reasons to believe that we can get going way faster than we have in previous crises,” Hassett said. Calling people “stock” is next level apathetic, and the way Hassett used the term so casually lines up with the lack of empathy shown to the victims of the coronavirus by Trump’s administration and Republicans since the crisis began months ago. Trump has moved ahead with attempts to cut food stamps during the crisis while Republicans in Congress have balked at passing a second stimulus package and are looking to phase out coronavirus-related unemployment benefits.
Boner Candidate #3: STRING ‘EM UP
It’s really frightening … a 2nd Amendment Kentucky rally the day before Memorial Day turned into an insane display of Governor Andy Beshear being hung in effigy. It makes no sense, other than some gun-toting fanatics wanting to whip the crowd into a frenzy. Around 100 people swarmed the Governor’s mansion to celebrate constitutional rights, as they packed heat. It was billed as a Second Amendment rally … “what it really means to be FREE.” Pastor Cliff Christman then launched on the Governor’s coronavirus restrictions, grousing, “This has been one of the biggest shams in world history … Grown men have been hiding in homes nearly wetting their pants over this invisible enemy that nobody sees. Where is it at? Let it come out and face us.” Now back to the hanging … how far are we from a Civil War when disagreements turn into symbolic lynchings? And, how far a distance is there between hanging in effigy and hanging for real? If the mindset is there, actions may not be far behind.
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ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: NOW WAIT, HOW DID YOU FIND ME?
DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. — Authorities say a 25-year-old felon wanted for violation of probation was arrested after sheriff’s deputies in Florida were notified he was streaming on Facebook Live. Officials say Timothy Munford filmed himself driving to Jet Ski facility and renting a watercraft on Friday. The video also showed an officer approach and arrest him. Volusia County Sheriff’s officials say they’d been advised Munford was known to be armed with a handgun with an extended magazine. Investigators found handguns, ammunition and drugs in his vehicle. He’s being held without bond while awaiting extradition to Marion County on probation violation charges.
Boner Candidate #2: THAT REALLY FLOATS GOV. WHITMER’S BOAT
Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer faced backlash from Republican lawmakers after a reported request from her husband to get the family’s boat out on the water before Memorial Day weekend — far from their home in Lansing. Whitmer, a Democrat, famously has imposed one of the strictest lockdowns in the country, sparking frequent protests. What’s more, she’s told people not living in Northern Michigan to stay away from vacation spots there during the holiday weekend. In Facebook posts no longer visible to the public, NorthShore Dock LLC and its owner, Tad Dowker, focused on what Dowker said was a request last week by Whitmer’s husband, Marc Mallory. The posts caught the attention of Republican state lawmakers, who said the governor’s family may not have wanted to follow the guidance she’s issued for the rest of the state. “This morning, I was out working when the office called me, there was a gentleman on hold who wanted his boat in the water before the weekend,” Dowker posted. “Being Memorial weekend and the fact that we started working three weeks late means there is no chance this is going to happen.”
Boner Candidate #3: NOW I HAVE TO CHANGE ALL MY ACCOUNTS.
WASHINGTON — It’s a feel-good story that President Trump’s press secretaries have relished over the years: the quarterly announcement of which government agency Mr. Trump has selected to be the lucky recipient of his salary, an easy way to show the president sticking to his 2016 campaign pledge to forgo his $400,000 salary and donate it. In the past, the $100,000 check from Mr. Trump has been made out to the Small Business Administration initiative to help veteran entrepreneurs, to the Office of the Surgeon General to fight the opioid epidemic, and to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, among other places. But on Friday, Kayleigh McEnany, the White House press secretary, did not just reveal that the president was sending his salary to the Department of Health and Human Services to help “support the efforts being undertaken to confront, contain and combat the coronavirus.” She also displayed the president’s private bank account and routing numbers.
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