ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: THE QUESTION IS, HOW DID HE GET HIRED BY THE MOAB POLICE?
The Moab Police Department failed to look at the reasons that Everett Gist, Jr. was previously fired from the Utah Department of Corrections.
Boner Candidate #2: GET THESE ‘DOG BOUNTY HUNTER PEOPLE’ OUT OF THE NEWS.
Cecily Chapman, daughter of Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman, says her father’s search for Brian Laundrie is just a “publicity stunt”.
Boner Candidate #3: “I AM AN IDIOT” YES YOU ARE.
Tennis star Andy Murray calls himself “an idiot” after his wedding ring was stolen when he forgot that he had it tied to his “sweaty” shoes and left them outside overnight.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: TEACHER SHOUTS ‘I DON’T CARE’ IN CLASSROOM MELT DOWN.
A teacher at Mead Middle School in Houston is facing termination after she was filmed removing her mask and breathing on the student. The teacher is seen yelling “I don’t care” as the student tries to get away from the unmasked teacher.
Boner Candidate #2: GETTIN’ IT ON AT THE BATES MOTEL.
An LA County Sherriff’s Deputy has been fired after leaving his radio on for a dispatcher to hear him allegedly have sex at Universal Studios while on duty.
Boner Candidate #3: DON’T YOU PEOPLE HAVE STAND YER GROUND LAWS?
Samantha Dehring was sentenced to four days in jail, given a fine, and is banned from Yellowstone for a year after she was filmed not moving and taking photos as a grizzly bear and her cubs charged Dehring.
