ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: WHO’S PANTS ARE DOWN?
Utah’s own Rep. Paul Ray claimed that ICU capacity problems aren’t caused by unvaccinated Utahns, but instead that companies like Intermountain Health care simply drove their nurses away with bad business decisions.
Boner Candidate #2: WAIT A MINUTE. THAT’S NOT A BAG OF PIZZA ROLLS.
A woman accidently stuck her hand into someone’s poop while reaching for a bag of pizza rolls at a grocery store. All because someone decided that the pizza rules would suffice as a toilet.
Boner Candidate #3: AGAIN, A PERFECT SOLUTION TO A PROBLEM
A park city man frustrated with bikers making a mess of trails, and making a ‘muddy mess’ decided that the best course of action was to key everyone’s cars.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: THIS PANDEMIC SUCKS. I GIVE UP.
A man who evaded Australia’s police for 30 years gave up, and turned himself in because he was tired of covid, and needed a roof over his head.
Boner Candidate #2: THE DEVIOUS LICK
TikTok’s “Devious Lick” challenge has inspired students across the nation to steal from their schools. Computers, mirrors and even urinals have been stolen.
Boner Candidate #3: HE CALLS IT THE ‘CLOT SHOT’ AND ‘NEEDLE RAPE.’ HE’S PERFECT FOR THE BOARD OF HEALTH.
Dr. Ryan Cole, who’s described a ‘rouge doctor’ called vaccines as ‘clot shots’ and ‘needle rape.’
