Boner Candidate #1: A ROBUST COFFEE BLEND WITH BITTER NOTES OF DESPERATION.
Rudy Giuliani is filtering out ways to make money amid his bankruptcy from $148 million debt. Despite that he has placed ads out for his personally branded coffee. Rudy has brewed up some photos on social media that reads, “finest beans imaginable.” There are three different flavors of “Rudy’s Coffee,” “America’s Mayor Rudy” would be the morning blend with “Fighting for Justice Rudy,” a bold java blend, and “Enjoying Life Rudy,” which is decaf. He has said, “You all know I stand by the truth, and if I put my name on something, I truly believe in it. It’s so good, I even recommend drinking it black.” Giuliani was suspended from his radio hosting gig with WABC Radio after continually pushing election fraud theories even when told to stop from the company, so this coffee rollout is no surprise.
via Yahoo News
Boner Candidate #2: PORNOGRAPHY HOW YOU GET THE SPERMS
A group named Family Research Counsel a lobbying group of Christian evangelical who rally against abortion, pornography, divorce, and LGBT rights. Led by Tony Perkins, a former Louisiana state legislator. Who makes excuses for former President Donald Trump’s scandalous behavior with Stormy Daniels, and believes he should ‘get a mulligan’. IVF is a popular treatment amongst couples who want a child but are unable to seem to get it done without intervention, and Tony Perkins is against the treatment believing it’s bad for marriages. “Pornography is an integral part of the IVF process. And the husband’s use of pornography is typically how sperms are obtained — that’s not good for a marriage. We know pornography goes against what God tells us about the dignity of men and women and the marriage act.”
via Two Paragraphs
WINNER!
Boner Candidate #3: “I NEARLY ESCAPED DEATH” WHICH MEANS, YOU DIDN’T ESCAPE AND THEREFORE YOU ARE DEAD.
Followers of Trump were sent a ‘shocking email’ from Donald himself, claiming “They were authorized to shoot me!” which he’s referring to Mar-A-Lago being searched. This is just a money grab for selling merchandise, “YOU, have you seen my mugshot? I put it on a mug for you.” Especially misleading because Trump was not even at his Mar-A-Lago property while it was being legally searched. The misleading email read, “WOW! I just came out of the Biden Witch Hunt Trial in Manhattan, the ‘Icebox,’ and was shown Reports that Crooked Joe Biden’s DOJ, in their Illegal and UnConstitutional Raid of Mar-a-Lago, AUTHORIZED THE FBI TO USE DEADLY (LETHAL) FORCE. NOW WE KNOW, FOR SURE, THAT JOE BIDEN IS A SERIOUS THREAT TO DEMOCRACY. HE IS MENTALLY UNFIT TO HOLD OFFICE — 25TH AMENDMENT!” Stephen D’Antuono, former FBI assistant director said, “We made sure we interacted with the Secret Service to make sure we could get into Mar-a-Lago with no issues. We’re not banging down any doors. We weren’t bringing any like FBI vehicles, everything that was reported about helicopters and a hundred people descending on, like a Die Hard movie, was completely untrue, right.”
via CNN – MSN
