Boner Candidate #1: ERIC IS TALLER….AND DUMBER.
Eric Trump took to the stand testifying a case brought against the Trump Organization for a $250 million in civil fraud. Specifically, overvaluing their properties in an attempt to secure lower bank loans rates, and taxation rates. Eric Trump was firm when he claimed he “never had anything to do with the statements of financial condition.” That’s when prosecutors presented Eric with emails, and phone calls detailing his knowledge of the statements of financial condition. Eric’s estranged cousin, Mary, said, “Eric testified today and basically just lost the entire case. Sounds like perjury is on today’s menu.”
via Newsweek
Boner Candidate #2: DID YOU CONFUSE THE CUPS, DUDE?
A Saratoga Springs man, Caleb Woods, called back his GrubHub driver to relieve himself of frustration after sipping from a drink that wasn’t what he ordered. Caleb stated, “When I started eating my meal upon delivery, I put a straw in my cup that was delivered and took a sip. I soon discovered that the cup delivered to me from the GrubHub driver was a warm cup of urine.” When the two faced against each other, Caleb asked, “Did you confuse the cups, cause, like, dude — it’s a half full of pee. “Do you realize this is pee?” GrubHub attempted to make things right by letting the driver go, and a partial refund.
via New York Post
Boner Candidate #3: I DON’T THINK I FEEL SAFE HERE.
A Utah man was arrested for spitting on a mother, and her 7 year old son due to their religious clothing. Robert Lowell Wolcott, 61, is booked into SLC jail while officers investigate. The mother posted to social media, He spit on us. Told us to go back to our country and called us every name in the book. All because we are Muslims. I am an American citizen. I am a law abiding citizen. I am a tax payer. I am active in my community. My son is 7. Completely innocent and is autistic. What a disgusting man. What a shame people are so ignorant about Islam. What a shame it’s dangerous to be a Muslim in today’s world.”
via KSL
