ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: THESE PILLS ARE ALL NATURAL SUPPLEMENTS
A man in Utah has confessed to making and selling his own ‘all natural’ erectile dysfunction supplements illegally, using Viagra.
Boner Candidate #2: WATCH WHAT DADDY CAN DO
With the goal of impressing his daughter, a man tried to break into the elephant enclosure at the Milwaukee zoo. He was stopped before entering the enclosure.
Boner Candidate #3: I KEEP THIS ONE WITH MY GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARD
Anti-maskers are keeping a new trick up their sleeve in the form of a fake medical card that exempts them from wearing masks.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: WELL, I DON’T BELIEVE IN STATISTICS… NOPE.
Governor of Texas Greg Abbott, explained the simple math used to explain the state’s decline in Covid-19 cases. You add the people who have been vaccinated, to the total number of cases. According to Gov. Abbott, this shows the herd immunity of the state as well as the lack of mathematicians in the state.
Boner Candidate #2: SHE CHARGES EXTRA FOR THE ‘IN-HER-BODY STUFF.’
The JFK airport in New York stopped a woman smuggling drugs in her purse, bra and ‘nether regions.’
Boner Candidate #3: IT’S A DONUMENT
A new act introduced by a congress freshman dubbed ‘the Donument Act’ would protect the border wall from being altered by classifying the wall as a monument in honor of twice impeached former president Donald Trump.
