Boner of the Day

Boner of the Day for April 9th, 2019

Round 1

Candidate #1: I WAS AT THE MOTEL 6 TO WRAP CHRISTMAS PRESENTS

Motel 6 has tentatively agreed to settle a lawsuit that alleges it discriminated against some Latino customers at multiple Phoenix locations by giving their whereabouts and personal information to immigration agents who later arrested at least seven guests. Details of the tentative deal, revealed Friday, July 6, 2018, in court records, haven’t been publicly released. The practice was the result of an informal arrangement: seven Motel 6 locations in Washington state shared the personal information of its guests with federal immigration officials on a daily basis between 2015 and 2017, authorities said. Of the 80,000 guests whose information was shared, at least nine were detained, officials said.

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Candidate #2: GIVE US CHEWIE

Two women were arrested on suspicion of knocking over a man who was out for a walk with his dog on Friday and stealing the animal, the Long Beach Police Department said.The incident happened at around 12 p.m. on the 800 block of Molino Avenue in Long Beach, California when a vehicle pulled up next to the man and two women got out, pushed him down and fled the scene with the small white dog named Chewie, police said.

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Candidate #3: MAMA, I’M GOING TO PEE!

As parents of toddlers know, nature doesn’t always call at the most convenient time. Brooke Johns was driving in Augusta, Georgia, when her 3-year-old son told her he was in urgent need of a bathroom. She pulled into a gas station parking lot, only to realize that they wouldn’t make it to the restroom. “He says, ‘Momma, I’m about to pee in my pants!'” Johns told CNN affiliate WRDW.
Johns was 34 weeks pregnant and couldn’t carry her son, Cohen, to the toilet. So she tried to cover her son up as best she could while he peed in the parking lot.
“He was peeing before his pants were even all the way down, so obviously he had to go,” says the mom, who lives in Beech Island, South Carolina. But law enforcement wasn’t so sympathetic.  A Richmond County Sheriff’s deputy witnessed the incident, which occurred March 29, and cited Johns for disorderly conduct.

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Round 2

Candidate #1: PANGOLIN SCALES ARE COSTING PANGOLINS THEIR LIVES

Authorities in Singapore have seized more than 14 tons of scales of pangolin scales bound for Vietnam in what Paul Thomson of the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s (IUCN) Pangolin Specialist Group described as the largest single such shipment on record, the New York Times reported on Monday. Thomson told the paper that the IUCN estimated around 36,000 pangolins were killed to harvest the scales, which is forbidden by international law.

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Candidate #2: THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN

Two people were arrested Monday on charges that they vandalized a memorial dedicated to slaves and African-American workers at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, the university police said. The suspects, Nancy Rushton McCorkle, 50, and Ryan Francis Barnett, 31, face misdemeanor charges of vandalism and ethnic intimidation. Mr. Barnett also faces a misdemeanor charge of public urination. Efforts on Monday evening to reach Ms. McCorkle and Mr. Barnett by phone and through email were unsuccessful. The university police said they identified the suspects through video surveillance footage. The Unsung Founders Memorial was defaced with racial slurs and urine on March 31, and at least one of the vandals had ties to a group called Heirs to the Confederacy, the university said.

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Candidate #3: YOUR CRIME IS TOILET RELATED VIOLENCE

A man from St. Petersburg, Florida, shocked his roommate Saturday when he fired a gun inside their house and shattered a toilet. Police said the bullet tore through numerous walls before it destroyed the porcelain throne, local station WTSP reported Sunday. Police arrested Ryan Rawson Montgomery, 40, who, according to an affidavit, claimed he was playing with the gun when it unexpectedly discharged. The roommate told police: “Hell yes, that could have hurt me,” the affidavit said, per WTSP. After the incident, Montgomery tossed the gun in an area of water nearby. A visitor, Sheryl Jackson, 64, took the bullet, later telling police she wanted to hide it. Police charged both Jackson and Montgomery with tampering with physical evidence. Also charged with culpable negligence and violating probation in Charlotte County, Montgomery is being held on a bail of $2,250. Jackson was released on a $2,000 bail, WTSP reported.

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