ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: WELL THE LADIES WOULDN’T WANT TO LEARN WELDING WOULD THEY?
While in prison, women aren’t given access to the same vocational trainings as men.
Boner Candidate #2: IT’S LIKE A HUMIDOR. IT HELPS KEEP THE WEED FRESH
A man was found with a 45 quart Yeti cooler filled with roughly a pound of weed.
Boner Candidate #3: AND THE FRUITCAKES AND HILLBILLIES KEEP GIVING THEM MONEY,
Years after the Columbine school shooting, a tape surfaced from a meeting between NRA members discussing how to respond to the shooting. The tape includes some of them calling their supporters “hillbillies” and “fruitcakes.” Included in the tape, one of the members expresses that they have almost complete control over conservative politicians, and that those politicians asked the NRA to “secretly provide them with talking points.”
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: HE STOLE MY BOUNCY HOUSE
A woman in Texas shot and killed her neighbor after accusing him of stealing their ‘bouncy house.’
Boner Candidate #2: OH THERE IS PLENTY OF SHAME IN THE NAME.
The last public hearing regarding the name change from Dixie State University to Utah Tech University included plenty of heated exchanges and immature and emotional debates between students.
Boner Candidate #3: IT’S ABOUT TIME THESE DAMN KIDS GOT A DECENT EDUCATION
A teacher at Dry Creek Elementary School took advantage of a Veteran’s Day speech to rant about Covid-19 vaccines, and socialism. A parent of one of the children attending the school said “It was just basically full of anti-Asian rhetoric talking about how people getting free handouts like food from the grocery store is anti-American and for lazy people,”
