!!! WINNER !!!
Boner Candidate #1: PRESIDENT BLUE SUIT TAKES A CALL AND A NAP AT THE VATICAN
Donald Trump along with Melania attended Pope Frances’ funeral, but Trump arrived in a blue suit. Along with showing up with a blue suit, he was also caught using his phone during the service and falling asleep. Of course, MAGA apologist were quick to defend Trump stating; “Lots of people wore blue suits; if Trump was on his phone, it was probably a national security emergency; if he fell asleep, so what, he probably wasn’t the only one. “
Boner Candidate #2: HAVE A VODKA SPRITZER. IT’S ON ME
In Highlands County Florida, police were left speechless when a suspect, in the middle of a car chase, casually offered them alcohol. Deputies responded to a market in Spring Lake after receiving a report that a later, later known as Richard Smith- had stolen multiple items, including alcoholic beverages. During the chase, Smith allegedly held out a can of Ketel One Vodka spritz out of his car window as he drove by a deputy that was trying to get him to pull over. Smith faces charges of aggravated assault on a law enforcement officer battery on a law enforcement officer resisting arrest, DUI and refusal to submit to a DUI test. He is being held on a $120,000 bond. While he was getting arrested, he told police; “You guys had fun, though, right?”
Boner Candidate #3: WHEN YOU GOTTA GO, YOU GOTTA GO
A female passenger on a Southwest Airline flight to Chicago apparently stripped down naked and then pooped on her seat as the plane was preparing to land. Police officers were called to Chicago’s Midway Airport as a flight from Philadelphia arrived with one passenger took off her clothes and went number 2 on the plane seat. Southwest Airlines sent out a statement stating; “Our teams are reaching out to those onboard to apologize for the situation and any delay to their travel plans.” Although there is no clear idea as to why the female passenger did this, the plane has been taken out of service to be cleaned.
