Boner of the Day

Boner Preview Candidates January 25, 2016

Boner Preview Candidate #1: MAYBE YOU DON’T DESERVE THE ACCLAIM YOU’RE GETTING AT THE END OF YOUR CAREER

Charlotte Rampling weighed in on the all-white Oscars controversy Friday morning. “It’s anti-white racism,” she told Europe 1 radio (via the Daily Mail). “Maybe black actors don’t deserve to be on the final stretch?” Rampling is nominated for Best Actress in a Leading Role for her work in “45 Years.”  The 69-year-old actress, who has dozens of films to her name, doesn’t believe in setting hiring quotas for actors of color, either. “Why classify people?” she asked. “They feel like a minority, they think: ‘We’re the black actors and there are not enough of us.’”

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Boner Preview Candidate #2: I SAID COME TO BED

A woman allegedly battered her husband with nunchucks because he refused to have sex with her. Sondra Earle-Kelly, 51, is alleged first to have hurled ceramic figurines at her lover when he refused stop watching TV and go to bed with her. Then she reportedly grabbed a pair of nunchucks and began to beat him with them.  Police found blood on the walls of the couple’s apartment. Earle-Kelly, who was also said to have taken a tranquiliser tablets over the course of the evening, has been charged with aggravated domestic violence.

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Boner Preview Candidate #3: RACISM IS ALIVE AND WELL

A suburban Phoenix school district is taking disciplinary action after a photo of students spelling out a racial slur with T-shirts showed up on social media. Tempe Union High School District spokeswoman Jill Hanks said Friday that the discipline process remains ongoing but six girls will be punished in accordance with district policies. Hanks says Desert Vista High School students were wearing shirts to spell out “BEST(asterisk)YOU’VE(asterisk)EVER(asterisk)SEEN(asterisk)CLASS(asterisk)OF(asterisk)2016” for a senior class yearbook photo. She says the girls in the photo went off on their own and used their shirts to spell out a racial slur, “n—–.”

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Boner Preview Candidate #4: GLUE IT. NO ONE WILL NOTICE

Eight Egyptians involved in a botched repair of the famed burial mask of King Tut, which was corrected late last year, were referred to a disciplinary court on Sunday for “gross negligence” after prosecutors said that the golden treasure was scratched. The 3,300-year old mask, whose beard was accidentally knocked off and hastily glued on with epoxy in 2014, was scratched and damaged as a result of the amateur repair job, prosecutors said in a Sunday statement, which implicated the then-head of the Egyptian Museum and the chief of the restoration department.

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Boner Preview Candidate #5: YES PLEASE…MORE GUNS IN PUBLIC.

A 29-year-old man suspected of shooting a woman inside a Renton theater Thursday night told detectives he brought the gun to the movie fearing a mass shooting. The incident happened at The Landing in Renton during a showing of the film “13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi.” It is the action-packed movie of the terrorist raid on the U.S. Embassy. About 15 minutes into the movie, a gun went off and a 40-year-old Michelle Mallari had been shot through the back of her chair.

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Boner Preview Candidate #6: TRUMP CLAIMS HE COULD SHOOT SOMEONE AND NOT LOSE VOTERS

Donald Trump suggested he could shoot someone in a crowded area and still keep voters, speaking at a rally in Iowa Saturday. Multiple reporters, including ones from CNN and CBS, quickly picked up Trump’s remarks. “I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue, shoot somebody, and I wouldn’t lose any voters,” Trump said.

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