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Boner Preview Candidates August 20, 2015

Boner Preview Candidate #1: WE PUT IT IN THE SAFE FOR SAFE KEEPING

Police are searching for an American family whose infant ended up locked in a hotel safe in Niagara Falls, Ont.

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Boner Preview Candidate #2: HOW YA GONNA WRITE ME A TICKET NOW, HUH? HOW YA GONNA DO IT NOW?

A man tried to take away a traffic enforcement officer’s power to ticket by blocking a license plate and then stealing the officer’s pen, police said.

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Boner Preview Candidate #3: NOT EVEN SAFE IN CHURCH

Police have arrested one of the two suspects believed to have robbed and assaulted a woman inside an Omaha church last Sunday.

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Boner Preview Candidate #4: THE EVIL BOY WANTED IT

In an extraordinary admission of wrongdoing, a priest sought by authorities in New Jersey has acknowledged engaging in a sexual encounter with a 15-year-old boy, but he deflected blame for the incident by saying the teen “wanted” it and had “evil in his mind.”

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Boner Preview Candidate #5: YET ANOTHER WRONG PATH FOR MR. DUGGAR

In 2013, conservative reality TV star Josh Duggar—of TLC’s 19 Kids and Counting fame—was named the executive director of the Family Research Council, a conservative lobbying group in D.C. which seeks “to champion marriage and family as the foundation of civilization, the seedbed of virtue, and the wellspring of society.” During that time, he also maintained a paid account on Ashley Madison, a web site created for the express purpose of cheating on your spouse.

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Boner Preview Candidate #6: HIS FIRST LION

An American hunter is being criticized on social media for posting images of his two children, who were ages 7 and 9 at the time,posing with dead lions that they had apparently shot and killed.

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Kristin Murphy/Deseret News

Boner Preview Candidate #7: Convicted killer tells victim’s family to ‘get over it’ at parole hearing

Michael Patterson, convicted of killing his girlfriend and dumping her body in Spanish Fork Canyon before shooting her roommate, says the victims’ families should just “get over it.” On Tuesday, Patterson’s first parole hearing since being sentenced to prison in 1998 was marked by outbursts and bizarre behavior. Patterson spoke in a slow, sometimes slurred voice that made him hard to understand at times. He also seemed to grow increasingly anxious as the hearing went on and blurted out bizarre comments when it wasn’t his turn to talk, prompting parole board Vice Chairman Robert Yeates, who conducted the hearing, to threaten to throw him out. “What do you want to do? What’s the deal?” Patterson asked Yeates, attempting to provoke him into making a final decision on his parole status right then.

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