8 Celebutard News Stories for Jan. 7, 2015

John Mayer Is Hot Now and Katy Perry Noticed (They Had a Sleepover)


Image By Eva Rinaldi

You know that feeling when you break up with John Mayer and you promise you’ll never hook up with him again, but then you see him at a friend’s dinner party a year later and you’re like, dang!? Katy Perry does, because on Saturday night, John Mayer reportedly came back to her house and stayed until 4 p.m. the next day.

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Jamie Dornan’s Dick and Balls Look Like a “Little Bag of Grapes”–Beware


Image By Jonathan Ryan

If 50 Shades of Grey star Jamie Dornan ever tries to give you grapes, please be careful, because those grapes are actually Mr. Dornan’s dick and balls.

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Mickey Rourke-My Dog Will Live Forever


Image By David Shankbone

Mickey Rourke will never forget his deceased dog, even if he wants to … because its nickname is now emblazoned on his arm.

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Ouch! Miley Cyrus shares bloody selfie


Image By Mariana Raquel 

The “We Can’t Stop” singer, 22, posted a gruesome Instagram photo showing blood running from her nose and onto her fingers.

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Michael Phelps’ Alleged Ex Dives In to Hardcore Porn


Image By JD Lasica

Michael Phelps’ self-proclaimed ex-girlfriend just had a close encounter with about a billion little swimmers … after shooting her very first hardcore porno flick.

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I’m Gonna Pull a Honey Boo Boo With My Own Show


Image By Lwp Kommunikáció

Anna “Chickadee” Cardwell wants to pick up where her little sis left off, because we’ve learned she’s shopping her very own reality show.

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Charlie Sheen Explodes On Kim K’s “Giggly Bag of Funk”


Image By Joella Marano

Charlie Sheen, a blinding sun of rage that consumes all in its ambit (starting with booze and Taco Bell), has exploded and collapsed on itself once again-this time in the general direction of Kim Kardashian and her “giggly” ass.

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Nicholas Sparks separates from wife of 25 years


Image By Alex Leung

The marriage of Nicholas Sparks appears to be headed for an unhappy ending.

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