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Boner Candidates for February 17, 2015

Boner Candidate #1: WELL, THIS IS AWKWARD

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Image By TheGiantVermin

According to The Mirror, a couple was busted on a subway escalator having very public and obvious sex. When a man tries to bust the couple up and get them to remember they aren’t in the privacy of their own home, the woman turns around to reveal she has a baby strapped to her. That’s right. A baby.

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Boner Candidate #2: I HAD A HARD TIME GETTING THE WEDDING DRESS OFF HER

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Image By Allen

Gavin Golightly and Amy Dawson were married at a church in West Rainton in August last year. The newlyweds, who have a child together, then enjoyed a reception at Beamish Hall in County Durham, where they were set to stay for the night. But as they returned to their room, Ms Dawson, 22, asked her new husband to help her take off her dress. Golightly, 29, refused, before getting up, throwing her to the floor and subjecting her to a terrifying assault, leaving her with a cut eyebrow and a bruised face and chest.

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Boner Candidate #3: I AM DEFINITELY NOT A RACIST AT ALL

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Image By James Montgomerie

A Mississippi lawmaker says racist comments recently attributed to him were taken out of context and supposed to be off the record. State Rep. Gene Alday, a Republican, told The Clarion-Ledger he was against increased funding for education, in particular funding to improve literacy. During his explanation, Alday said he comes “from a town where all the blacks are getting food stamps and what I call ‘welfare crazy checks.’ They don’t work.” Alday also told the newspaper about a time he visited an emergency room. “I liked to died. I laid in there for hours because they (black people) were in there being treated for gunshots,” Alday was quoted as saying.

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Feature Image By clotho98

 


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